


Cupid's Arrows

by JennieSupremacy



Category: ASTRO (Band), ATEEZ (Band), GOT7, K-pop, NCT (Band), Stray Kids (Band), SuperM (Korea Band), iKON (Korea Band), 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Age Regression/De-Aging, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Violence, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Little Space, M/M, Multi, Non-Sexual Age Play, Possessive Behavior, Rough Kissing, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Hatred, Suicide Attempt, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, unhealthy eating habits
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:01:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 23,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27454669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JennieSupremacy/pseuds/JennieSupremacy
Summary: Oneshots/two shots about boy groups,I also posted this on wattpad with the same name.
Relationships: Bang Chan/Hwang Hyunjin, Choi San/Jung Wooyoung, Goo Junhoe/Kim Jiwon | Bobby, Jackson Wang/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Jungwoo, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Lee Dongmin | Cha Eunwoo, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Nakamoto Yuta, Kim Jongin | Kai/Mark Lee (NCT), Kim Taehyung | V/Park Jimin, Kim Yugyeom/Park Jinyoung/Jackson Wang, Lee Dongmin | Cha Eunwoo & Everyone, Lee Dongmin | Cha Eunwoo/Moon Bin, Mark Lee/Nakamoto Yuta, Matthew Kim | BM/Kim Taehyung | J.Seph, Nakamoto Yuta/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Nakamoto Yuta/Xiao De Jun | Xiao Jun
Comments: 8
Kudos: 108





	1. Jaehyun x Jungwoo [Nct]

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing, so don't crucifie me yall if it's bad, I'm trying ✋

Jungwoo hated times like this. 

When they just finished practicing, or recording, and they were all sweaty, hungry and most importantly, tired. 

And all he wanted was just to go home, eat all he could and fall into bed in a deep, relaxing and much needed sleep.

And now, more than ever considering that he had beenpracticing with Jaehyun for about six hours straight, trying to get the choreography right, and he was tired. 

He just wanted to go home, possibly cuddle up with Jaehyun on his bed, and fall asleep. 

But now, he couldn't even do that, considering the fact that somebody apparently locked them in. 

And now, he was desperately trying to control himself from breaking something. 

The tiredness and hunger got to him, as if the fact that they had a full day of recording tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and it was fucking one in the morning and he hadn't got an ounce of sleep yet. 

All of that mixed creating an explosive blend, making Jungwoo a deadly bomb. 

And Jungwoo was _this_ close to go off. 

He had already called Taeyong and told him what happened, and the leader told him he was going to talk to the manager about, and to expect a call. 

That was three hours ago. 

So Jungwoo was seriously considering tearing the door off it's hinges.

And then there was Jaeyhun. 

That boy usually fell asleep anywhere, anytime, but it seemed like the hunger didn't let him do so, and now he was sitting half asleep near Jungwoo on the floor of the practice room. 

At least, his crush was with him, and now that he thought about it... 

He was alone, with _his crush_. 

This was something that happened once in a blue moon. 

They were usually all always pretty much together, and considering the fact that Jaehyun was best buddy with everyone, Jungwoo never found that many chances to catch him alone and do something about his crush, and every time he managed to be alone with him, he chickened out last minute. 

But really, can you blame him? 

Everyone would be scared in that situation. 

To have Jaeyhun sit there with that stupid charming smile, and those stupid adorable dimples and having look at you so softly, it just-

It pained him the fact that Jaehyun may never look at him again, if he confessed and he wouldn't have felt the same. 

He just couldn't risk it, but again, what if Jaehyun did feel that way towards him? 

Said boy stomach growled once more startling him out of his dizzy state. 

Jungwoo at that turned to him, finding the boy rubbing his tummy with a light blush on his cheeks. 

He was embarrassed. 

_Cute_. 

The older never failed to steal a smile out of him. It was like a hidden talent. 

"You hungry hyung?" Jungwoo soft voice broke that comfortable silence they were sitting in, catching the attention of the half asleep boy beside him.

Jaehyun slowly turned his head and gave a slight nod, cheek flushed and a small smile on his face.

God, how much he loved that smile, and those blushy cheeks he could just eat right up-

"Yeah but-" a yawn broke his sentence, "i'm really tired too, i just wanna sleep." Jaehyun finished, with a light whine coming through at the end.

Jungwoo chuckled again, wrapping an arm around the older shoulder and bringing Jaehyun onto him, so he was resting sideways against his chest. 

"You're so cute hyung, is it 'cause you're sleepy or 'cause you're with me?" Jungwoo said, with a teasing smile. 

At that, Jaehyun blushed a bright red before hiding his face behind his sweater paws.

"Jungwoo! Why do you always say things like that?" The older spoke in a soft, barely audible voice. 

The wavering of the sentence made Jungwoo just want to tease him more. 

"You're trying to tell me you don't like it when i say those things, hyung?" 

Jaehyun buried his head even deeper in the other's rock hard chest, "W-well i never said that, it's just-, it makes me all fuzzy and s-stuff, it's a g-good feeling, but, i don't know. " 

_I make you 'fuzzy and stuff'?_

_A good feeling?_

_Huh_. 

A cocky smirk rose to his face, a complete contrast to his racing heart, he hugged the boy closer to him, if it was possible getting closer than they already were. 

He leaned towards Jaehyun's ear lobe, before lightly biting it. 

That brought a squeak out of the boy. 

"Do you want me to make you feel even better, hyung?" 

Jaehyun eyes grew in size as they stared at Jungwoo's teasing ones. 

The older cheeks by now were completely red. 

Jaehyun's eyes flickered to Jungwoo's parted lips, making Jungwoo eyes almost stop. 

_Could it really be?_

Jaehyun's started leaning towards him slowly, to slowly for Jungwoo's liking, so Jungwoo gripped the other's jaw bringing Jaehyunto him, their lips almost touching-

A ringing sounded in the room, startling Jaehyun out of his dazed state, who realized what was about to happen, and curled up on himself, completely hiding his face in embarrassment from the other's view.

Jungwoo though, he was _fuming_. 

He finally had enough courage to do something about his crush on Jaehyun , and when he was about to kiss him, someone had to be in the way. 

With anger practically coming out of his pores, he got his phone out of his pocket, it read Taeyong on the ID of the caller. 

_I'm gonna smack him as soon as i get out i swear to god-_

"Hyung it better be something important 'cause i swear to fucking Christ-"Jungwoo practically growled into the phone. 

"First of all watch your fucking mouth, and second of all you ain't gonna do shit if you want to get out of the fucking room." 

Taeyong sharp voice interrupted him and although he was raging, he still was scared of their leader. 

Disrespect it's not something he took lightly. 

" Yes, yes, i'm just angry because-"he glanced down at the boy on his chest, who one way or another, managed to finally fall asleep,"-never mind, i'm not angry." 

"Oh my god, why do you sound like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're smitten about something, or someone. Wait-"

Jungwoo rolled his eyes in annoyance, already knowing what was Taeyong about to say.

"Yes, it's about Jaehyun-hyung. You would be too. You can't believe how cute he is when he's sleepy, he's so fucking adorable. His eyes are always droopy, then his cheek are always flushed and he's _so clingy_ , he literally wouldn't stop playing with my hand to make himself stay awake i was about to cry-"

" _Jesus Christ_ , you're so in love it's disgusting." 

"You're just jealous because Johnny still ain't lookin' at your ass-" 

"Do you want to get out of there or not?", aside from the threat, the embarrassment could be _heard_ through the phone, and it did wonders to Jungwoo, who quietly snickered. 

"Sorry, hyung" 

"Now where's my baby at?"

Jungwoo glanced down again at the sleeping boy, a loving smile forming on his face,"He actually fell asleep. On my chest."

"Aww! You must be in heaven right now, huh?"

"Yes, and i would have been even better, if you hadn't called, i was about to kiss him."

"WHILE HE WAS ASLEEP!? YOU-" 

Jungwoo rolled his eyes once again, and stopped Taeyong screaming immediately, "No you dumbass, he fell asleep after you called me."

A small pause could be heard before the leader let out a quiet, "Oh." 

"Yeah oh, now could you please tell me when you're getting us out of here, i'm about to have a meltdown." 

"Oh, right! So what happened is, on of the staff member got drunk and forgot y'all were in there, so he locked y'all in and he is the one who has the key. And now they are trying to figure out where the fuck he is gone to." 

Jungwoo stared blankly at the wall. 

"What the fuck is wrong with people in SM? I genuinely don't get it, like, is it crack, cocaine, maybe meth?" 

A loud laugh could be heard on the other side, of the phone. 

And although it brought a smile to his face, he was still irritated, angry, hungry and tired. 

"So what now?" 

Jungwoo heard a loud sigh, before Taeyong soft voice came through the phone, "If they don't find the guy, they'll probably call someone to come bust down the door or something?" 

The end of the sentence came out more as a question and it definitely didn't assure Jungwoo. 

"Why did it sound like a question?" 

"Dude-, i don't okay, just be positive and patient. I'm sure they gon' find the guy and get you two out of there." 

Taeyong's voice held a certain assurance that only he could pull of, and it calmed Jungwoo down, even if just a little. 

He held Jaehyun a little bit closer as a sigh escaped his mouth, "Alright, see you then, dork." 

A teasing note to his voice escaped at the end of the phrase making Taeyong huff out a laugh. 

"Be respectful you brat, or i might just let you rot in there, then again, you wouldn't mind being stuck there with Jaehyun, huh?" 

The smirk on his face could be heard from anyone, and Jungwoo flushed a slight red, as he immediately hung up the phone.

Jungwoo let out a sigh, closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall.

He looked at Jaehyun's sleeping form again, and brought a hand to the other's face, caressing it gently. 

When his hand reached Jaehyun's lips, said boy slowly opened his eyes, making Jungwoo's heart jump in his chest.

Jaehyun was a still little bit sleepy, judging by the way he was having a hard time keeping his eyes open. 

And Jungwoo couldn't help but admire his beauty. 

The shape of his eyes, the sharp jawline, contrasting the soft cheeks and the little nose, but going really well with his sinful plump lips. 

"Why'r you staring at me 'Woo?" 

A rough voice broke Jungwoo' s train of thoughts. 

He let his eyes focus on the boy in his arms, that was staring at him with a shy smile on his lips, but that still held a certain confidence, showing he knew something. 

"Because you're gorgeous, hyung."

Jungwoo voiced his thoughts, and seemed to be all that took to make Jaehyun confidence go away, making place for a flustered mess, once again. 

"Oh- i-, uhm-" 

Jaehyun opened ans closed his mouth several times, before letting out a small, muttered 'Thank you', and immediately tried to hide his face in Jungwoo's chest again, only for the younger to grip his chin and bring him towards him. 

Jungwoo stared at Jaehyun's wide eyes, who was blushing at how close Jungwoo was to him, mere inches separating their lips from touching. 

Jungwoo's eyes moved from Jaehyun's eyes to his slightly parted lips, sitting shiny and glossy, almost as a temptation just for him. 

Wait, is that-

_Fucking lip-gloss, it should be illegal._

Lip gloss was one of Jungwoo weakness, it was an unusual turn on, but he had it nonetheless, and seeing it on Jaehyun lips, was doing things to him. 

"Can i kiss you, hyung?" 

It was a breathless request, so intimate and innocent as it was passionate. 

And the older could only look him in the eyes, that held a certain something to them, before responding a quick and barely audible, "Yes." 

And that was all that Jungwoo needed, as he immediately attacked Jaehyun's lip in a chaste and simple kiss, but that held so much. 

Jungwoo was able to taste the sweet flavor of lip gloss on the other's lip, it was strawberry. 

They stayed like that for a couple more seconds, just in each other arms, before the kiss became more passionate and hungry. 

Their lips began moving in an almost perfect synch with each other, like they had kissed a thousand times before. 

Jungwoo felt Jaehyun's hand travel around his neck, to pull him closer. 

And he let his own hands wander around the others body to stop on his waist. He snaked his hand under the sweater and gripped Jaehyun's waist, in a not to tight but still firm grip. 

He began running his hand on Jaehyun's abs, immediately leaving them for his _luscious_ pecs, that Jungwoo deliberately squeezed. 

That made Jaehyun lightly gasp in Jungwoo's mouth, giving him the opportunity to enter Jaehyun's mouth with his tongue. 

Thr most _sinful_ sound escaped Jaehyun, making Jungwoo practically growl into Jaehyun mouth. 

Jungwoo was taking his sweet time tasting every bit of the older mouth with his tongue, enjoying to the fullest every second of it. 

And by the sounds coming out of Jaehyun, he could tell he was enjoying it too. 

Still not giving Jaehyun a moment to breathe, Jungwoo shifted them in a smooth movement bringing the older on his lap. 

While Jaehyun's hands were still around Jungwoo's neck, the younger let his hand travel to the older toned ass, gripping and squeezing, before giving a light slap, making Jaehyun moans go higher in volume. 

He finally decided to elt Jaehyun's mouth rest, only to attack the older neck. 

As soon as he attached his mouth to it and started sucking, Jaehyun shifted a little to give Jungwoo more space, giving himself completely to Jungwoo, who in response could only groan in pleasure. 

Jungwoo finally pulled back letting Jaehyun's head fall on his shoulder. 

_I just kissed Jaehyun._

_I just kissed Jaehyun._

_I kissed Jaehyun._

_I fucking kissed Jaehyun._

A soft, endearing smile rose to his face, he let his stare fall onto Jaehyun's face and, oh God, he looked so heavenly. 

His eyes were glazed over and unfocused, his cheek were once again flushed, only this time it was not from embarrassment. 

He looked at his lips who were swollen and a burning red from Jungwoo's roughness, and they were a bit parted, with Jaehyun's tongue falling slightly out. 

He then let his eyes wander to his neck, that sported several purple and red marks all over it. 

He looked so _fucked out_ already, and it was just from a kiss. 

He looked dazed and not completely here, signaling that he was probably in some sort of headspace. 

Jungwoo would've cum right there if he didn't have a little bit of control. 

And control is what he needed for what was he about to do. 

A heavy sigh escaped his mouth as he leaned his head against the wall. 

"Hyung?" Jungwoo soft voice seemed to shake Jaehyun out of his headspace, as his eyes slowly focused on Jungwoo and a soft smile bloomed out on his face. 

It definitely _didn't_ make Jungwoo heart flutter. 

Jungwoo grasped the older face in both of his hand, slowly caressing his cheeks. 

Jaehyun in response immediately leaned into the touch, lashes fluttering against his blushy cheeks. 

"Hyung, i have to tell you something."

He intended to make the words come out firm and put together, but instead, they came out wavering and shaky.

That causing Jaehyun expression to fill with worry, concern and.... _fear_?

"Did i do something wrong-"

"I love you." 

The three words came out of Jungwoo's mouth almost like a whisper, barely audible, but Jaehyun heard them well.

He looked into Jungwoo's eyes with his own, wide and staring right Jungwoo's soul.

The words were followed by a loud silence, stretched between the two boys making Jungwoo feel even more anxious then he already was. 

The boy on his lap was looking almost in a trans, and Jungwoo almost regretted saying those words, with his mind beginning to creat a thousand different things to say-

A pair of lips came crashing on his own, bringing him back into reality and interrupting his train of thoughts. 

Stupid thoughts at that, 'cause for Jaehyun to be kissing him like that, after saying _'i love you'_ surely had to mean something, right? 

The kiss however was as short as it was sweet, with Jaehyun backing out to look Jungwoo dead in the eyes.

"I love you too." 

_Huh_. 

Jungwoo zoned out, not having fully registered the words that had come out of Jaehyun's mouth. 

And then the words did register into his brain. 

He engulfed Jaehyun into a tight bear hug, trapping against his chest. 

While the older was busy giggling, he buried his head into his neck and started peppering the skin with little kisses. 

"Is that what you were looking all worried about?" 

The older said in between giggles, apparently finding the situation and suffering of Jungwoo very funny. 

"Hey! Don't laugh at me, i was anxious ok? I thought you didn't think of me that way."

The whine only made Jaehyun's giggles intensify, resulting in more whines from Jungwoo. 

"How could you ever think that?", a couple of breathless laughs escaped in between the sentence. 

Jaehyun face became a little bit more serious, still with a gentle smile gracing his face. "Was i not obvious enough for you?" 

Jungwoo at that tilted his head in confusion, clearly lost.

Jaehyun playfully rolled his eyes.

"Tell me this, do you see me act like this, with the other members?" 

Jungwoo blanked, just a little. 

"Well, n-no but-" 

"Exactly. You see me do this only with you. You seriously didn't question my sudden adoration for hugs and shit like that?" Jaehyun said, a soft laugh coming through at the end. 

He sounded genuinely a little confused too. 

And now that Jungwoo thought about it, he didn't.

He didn't question how different he acted with skinship from day to day. 

It was only an after thought that came from time to time, quickly killed by thinking he did this with everyone. 

He should've thought something. Jaehyun doesn't just simply let you pinch, kiss and carress his cheeks. He doesn't let you cuddle with free will. He doesn't just let you pull him into your lap. 

_He was so dumb._

"I mean, come on bro, i let you feed me strawberries the other day-" 

Jungwoo ducked his head in pure shame. 

He was so fucking embarrassed he could die right there. 

"-when do i let you guys feed me?" 

Jaehyun was full on cracking up, the cause partly being how embarrassed and mortified Jungwoo looked. 

"I don't even like strawberries, like come on-" Jaehyun let his head fall on his chest, unable to held his giggles. 

Body shaking from laughter. 

"It's literally not that funny." The sentence was blank and flat, in attempt to hide the embarrassment that was trying to burst out of him. 

"It is, though." 

"Is not." 

"It is."

"Is not!"

Jaehyun raised his hands, a form of surrender. " _~Okay_ , whatever you say, you should get your eyes checked tho, 'cause you must be blind to not catch those hints-"

A hiss cut off his words.

Jungwoo was softly biting his earlobe, a dark and hungry look in his eyes.

"Do i need to shut you up in another way baby?" The sentence, although having a soft and gentle tone, it held something filled with _lust_ , that made Jaehyun shiver on his lap.

"I-"

"GUYS! I FINALLY GOT YOU OUT, WE CAN GO HO-"

They both snapped their head at the booming of Taeyong's voice, who stopped mid sentence. 

He stood there with a hand on the doorknob, a smile locked on his face betrayed by a blank look in his eyes.

His eyes locked onto Jungwoo's, who in response to the sharp look gulped, loudly.

"Jungwoo-ah, what the fuck do you think you're doing?"

He slowly turned his gaze to them two again. He had his hand around Jaehyun's throat, who was covered in dark marks. His other hand gripping Jaehyun's hand tightly. Said boy was sitted on his lap, head rested in the crook of his neck. Who pretty much looked dead asleep. 

_Oh, fuck._

He knew how overprotective Taeyong was, especially with Jaehyun, and with how they were looking, he was sure he was going to get his ass beat. 

"U-uhm-"

"You better get your ass up and those hands off of him, and you better have an explanation little boy. And God-forbid this it'll be the last time i leave you alone with Jaehyun. 'Cause what the FUCK! I LEAVE YOU ALONE WITH HIM FOR A FUCKING HOUR AND YOU ALMOST FUCK HIM-"

_He was fucked._


	2. San X Wooyoung [Ateez]

Wooyoung should have known. 

He should've known that it was going to end up like this. 

And he should have done something to prevent it. 

But he didn't. 

He decided not to make it a big deal, when that morning San didn't come skipping in the kitchen, throwing his arms around everyone in sight. 

He didn't say anything when he noticed the heave eye bags and bloodshot eyes, staring right at the bowl of cereal Wooyoung placed in front of him. 

And he didn't say anything when San got up saying he wasn't hungry, and disappeared into the bathroom. 

He ignored the fact that on their way to practice, San barely talked with anyone.

He ignored how he seemed to struggle to walk, huffing heavy breaths and gripping anything in reach, almost to stabilize him from falling.

And he ignored the fact that the little hadn't actually _been little_ , in a long time. 

He didn't make a big deal out of the fact that San literally looked two seconds away from passing out as soon as they arrived in practice.

He thought that San having the hardest time with the choreo wasn't a big deal.

He thought that San wanting to take a break 10 minutes in the routine wasn't a big deal.

And it sure wasn't a big deal if San looked so worn out and _lifeless_ , if it wasn't for the flaming red cheeks he sported.

But he made it a big deal, when the dancer dropped to the floor, going so limp, Wooyoung felt his blood run cold.

When he saw San unmoving body on the floor, he felt like the worst human being in the entire world.

When he cradled San in his lap, and he felt how much he was burning, and much sick he looked, he felt like crying. 

When San wouldn't wake up no matter how much he tried, Wooyoung felt like crying. 

When they had to take him to the hospital, and they took him away from him _he cried_. 

He cried all the way to the dorm. 

He was crying when the manager finally told them that they could visit him. 

He was still crying on their way to the hospital. 

He was crying and crying and crying, while silently cursing himself, because as much as he wanted to believe none of this was his fault, he couldn't help but think that way. 

Because what kind of best friend would let his other half reduce themselves to that state? 

What kind of boyfriend would ignore the obvious sign of your partner hurting? 

What kind of _caregiver_ let their little crumble in front of their eyes like that? 

He thought that over and over again, while gently but firmly grasping San small hand into his own. 

And now, watching over San's sleeping form, laying on the bed in the quiet hospital room, Wooyoung wondered.... Could he even call himself those things? 

_Dehydrated, overly exhausted, wasn't eating enough for how much he was working and how little he was sleeping..._

Those are the things that caused San to pass out, according to the nurse that checked on him.

He gripped his hair with his free hand, pulling purposely hard and taking the light but stingy pain in sort of a punishment for himself. 

He watched the smaller quietly fall apart before his own eyes, and didn't do nothing about it. 

He noticed all the things that screamed to him that San wasn't well at all, and he decided to ignore them.

He wouldn't be surprised if San told him to fuck off as soon as he saw him. 

_He probably deserved it._

Wooyoung didn't even realize he was crying until an extremely cold, but gentle hand, came to wipe his tears, before resting them against his cheeks. 

He slowly lifted his head, and there San was.

He looked sleepy, out of it and still obviously sick, but he still managed to be the most gorgeous guy Wooyoung ever laid his eyes on.

He was sitting there with a small smile gracing his lips, while he caressed Wooyoung cheek, with a gentleness Wooyoung could only associate with him.

_He truly didn't deserve him._

"Why 'r you crying Yongie?" 

San's voice was raspy, rough and a little bit lower, signaling that he just woke up, but somehow he still managed to make it the most comforting sound for Wooyoung. 

And the slight softer and childish edge to it, made Wooyoung realize he was right on the verge of slipping. 

And that didn't comfort him at all. 

Wooyoung took the other hand in his, carefully intertwining their fingers, almost afraid that San would pull back. 

"Sannie, i'm really really sorry, i-if only i noticed something you wouldn't be h-here, it's all my fault and-" 

"Woo-"

"-and i realize i've been an awful friend, a terrible boyfriend and an horrible caregiver-"

"Wooyoung-"

"-and i really understand if you don't want me as your c-caregiver anymore-"

Wooyoung rumbling was cut off by a pair of cold but soft lips crashing against his, connecting them in a loving and sloppy kiss.

He felt San arms snake around his neck and pull him closer, and closer until he was practically hovering the little.

At that San broke the kiss, much to his displeasure, and brought his hands to wipe Wooyoung tears, once again.

"What are you talking about? Why wouldn't i want you to be my caregiver anymore?"

A simple question that, despite the adorable tone, for some reason made Wooyoung heart skip a beat. 

"I-i should've took much more care of you. Despite seeing that something was clearly wrong i decided to i-ignore it and i-"

Wooyoung strained monolog was cut of by the sweet giggle of the boy underneath him.

"You really think i would leave you for something like this?" San said breathless between the giggle that were erupting from him.

At that Wooyoung flushed a bright red and gave a barely visible nod, to which San responded with another fit of giggles.

"What's so funny?" Wooyoung whined, stretching the last word.

San began placing little kisses all over the other face, before stopping.

"It's funny that you would think that i would leave you for something like this, it's not your fault Yongie."

"It is! I should have done something-"

"And i should've said something, it's my fault too. You're over thinking this. "

Wooyoung at that stopped and looked at him with a pout on his face.

"You're unbelievable."

"And you worry too much. "

Wooyoung smiled and placed a little kiss on the little nose.

"Just for you, _my love_." All said with a badly made solemn tone. 

San faked a gag and brought Wooyoung face in the crook if his neck, in attempt to hide the blush on his face that Wooyoung knew it was caused by the nickname.

"You're so fucking cheesy."

"Language, _you brat_." 


	3. Jackson x Jinyoung/Yugyeom [Got7]

Tension was the only thing prominent in GOT7, for the last month. 

After promotion of their last album, who gained a lot of success and pushed the group to even new heights, they were given a break, a real break. 

And things went quite smoothly, everyone relaxed, being finally out of their CEO grasp, and for once, they felt at peace. 

At lest till one dramatic and heated argument between Yugyeom and Jinyoung. 

And the reason for this was Jackson. 

Well, he wasn't the cause of it, but he was why the other two fought.

So, everyone knew that Jackson was a cuddly guy, whether it was the group, someone outside the group, or even a stranger.  
You will not get him out of your sight until he gave you at least of hug.  
But the two dudes who were never safe from Jackson were Jinyoung and Yugyeom.

If you were to ask Jackson why the two guys were his favorites, he would probably make you a list about it.

About Yugyeom, he loved running his hand through his curly hair, he loved holding his much bigger hand and sometimes even play with, and he adored how tall the other was.  
He constantly made sure to be cuddle up as close as possible to him, whether they were walking or simply watching something on the tv.  
He then proceeded to place his head against the other chest, (which was getting buffer and buffer) and fall asleep against it almost immediately.  
And the other did not make any move to stop him.

Yugyeom loved holding his against him, he loved letting his small hand play with his, and he absolutely adored the feeling of the other on his chest.  
He practically basked in the other cuddles.  
Or maybe it was because the person that was giving them to him, was the one that he loved.  
That is one thing he couldn't explain, it just happened.  
One day he was seeing Jackson as a best friend, and the other he was on the verge of dying just by holding hands with him.  
He was not complaining tho.

With Jinyoung was pretty much the same, except for the fact that he didn't show it.  
At least in front of Jackson.

The times that he let his love for other combust out of him, was for example when the other brought him to his room, whining about not being able to sleep.  
Jinyoung would make no complain and let the other drag him to his bed, he let the other attach around him as much as he wanted and when he finally made sure Jackson fell asleep, he gently wrapped his arms around him and caressed the rapper face, slowly, careful not to startle him out of his sleep.

And after that he would place one simple, but filled with love, kiss to his cheek, another on his forehead and the last one near his incredibly soft looking lips.

The morning after, Jinyoung would make Jackson go through hell just to be able to hold his hand. Just like that, the "annoyed" and "irritated" Jinyoung was back. 

But maybe Jinyoung would've been better off dropping this act, in fact he was pretty sure it was driving little Jackson away from him.

It started slowly, it was almost unnoticeable but Jinyoung caught onto everything.  
Usually, in the morning, a still half asleep Jackson would go straight to were Jinyoung was always seated on the couch.  
His favorite stuffed animal in arms and a bowl of his favorite cereals in hand, he would waddle towards him and sit right on his laps, not after demanding Jinyoung to put on some random TV-show.  
And that was one of Jinyoung favorite moments of the days. 

But now he would wake up, go to the living room and see that Jackson was already awake, munching on cereal while watching the TV, on Yugyeom lap. 

And that was just one of many things that had changed.  
The only thing that was still the same, was that Jackson still came to him when he couldn't sleep.  
That was the only he had left, and the only thing keeping him stable. 

But he wondered, how much time before Jackson would also stop doing that? 

His mind was starting to bring back all time he pushed Jackson back, not wanting the other to know about his feelings.  
It was extremely stupid but somehow in Jinyoung mind it made sense. 

And maybe his concerns were valid.

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

If you walked through GOT7 dorm, you could probably feel the tension wrap around you. 

And maybe Jinyoung had knew the reason. 

It was for a couple of weeks, that Yugyeom and Jinyoung, mostly Yugyeom had been constantly jabbing at each other, as soon as Jackson choose one of them over the other.

Jinyoung would not miss a chance to throw a smug look and sly smirk as soon as Jackson choose him to go somewhere with him, then come home and talk about it in front of everyone, he thrived in seeing Yugyeom clench his jaw and stop himself from probably snapping at him. 

And Yugyeom would make sure to always touch Jackson as much as possible, especially in front of Jinyoung, when Jackson wanted to cuddle with him.  
He would run his hand through Jackson's hair, and start placing kisses all over Jackson face. 

And that, somehow made Jinyoung throw his morals out the window, as he started to show more...affection, towards Jinyoung. 

From picking him up in a hug and bringing him with him to the couch, from willingly holding his hand, he even started feeding from time to time, but that was mostly to see Yugyeom twitch in frustration. 

Jackson tho, was very confused. 

Yugyeom started getting more possessive and protective, which he did not despise, but he also missed the softness and gentleness he used before. 

And Jinyoung was weird too.  
Don't get him wrong, he absolutely loved all the attention he was getting from him but it also felt so obsessive. 

Meanwhile the other boys were watching it all from a distance, questioning how was Jackson so oblivious, and what kind of psychological problems the other two had. 

So the decided they would leave them alone for sometime, in order to risolve whatever the fuck was going on. 

At least they hoped. 

And that is how Jinyoung and Yugyeom found themselves alone in the dorm with Jackson. 

At the moment they were all sitting on the couch watching some random TV show that was obviously Jackson choice. 

Well Jinyoung and Jackson were sitting on the couch, while little Jackson was sitting on Yugyeom lap, snuggled against his chest, giggling from time to time at the characters in the shows. 

And Jinyoung really wanted to fall asleep but knowing that the guy he loved was sitting on someone else lap, was enough to keep him awake.  
Meanwhile the maknae was clearly enjoying it as he watched Jackson with a smile, and a stare full of fondness. 

They stayed like that for a while, and sometime between the episodes of the show, Jackson ended dead asleep. 

Yugyeom at that started playing with Jackson hair, while caressing the rapper's cheeks from once in a while. 

That sight angered Jinyoung to new extent.  
He just couldn't bring himself to watch from the corner of his eyes.

At this point the show was long forgotten, now there were just swift and dirty looks Yugyeom sent Jinyoung, that was only irritating him more and more.  
And he was sure that Yugyeom intention. 

Jinyoung grumbled under his breath and picked up the remote of the TV to turn it off.  
The continuous noise was just annoying him more. 

He rested his head against the couch and finally decided to go to sleep.  
He had enough of today. 

It had been a continuous struggle to not slide Yugyeom.  
The fact that made him rage was that they had not said a word to each other the whole day.  
Not even a goodmorning.  
So Jinyoung, being the mature self that he is decided to simply ignore him.  
And he would've succeeded if it wasn't for Yugyeom sneaky remarks everytime Jackson wanted to do something with him.  
Another thing that also hurt him, was that Jackson didn't come to him, one time this day, expect for the usual 'goodmorning' followed by a quick peck on the cheek. 

Today it was all Yugyeom. 

So you could say he just wanted to end the damn day. 

But just as he was to the verge of falling asleep, Yugyeom voice jerked him awake. 

"You're really weird, Jinyoung-hyung." 

Hearing this, the older head snapped towards the Yugyeom, who was looking at the boy in his lap, not giving Jinyoung a single look.

"Excuse me?"  
His voice came out rough and strained, and he didn't even know why.

"I said, you're weird hyung."  
This time Yugyeom turned towards Jinyoung, staring at him with an expression Jinyoung couldn't decipher.

"H-how am i weird?"

Yugyeom shrugged, and he started to play with Jackson hair.

"Well, i just find it really strange the as soon as Jackson finally gets tired of your attitude towards him, and comes to for comfort, you suddenly want him all to yourself.  
Why is that hyung?"

Jinyoung definitely didn't expect that kind of question, but at the same time he should've expected it, because now, he didn't have words for him.

"I-i don't know wh-"

"I think i made it pretty clear for everyone that i like Jackson-hyung.  
So at first i thought you just wanted take him away from me, for some stupid reason."

"What are you t-talking-"

"Or maybe you thrive in seeing Jackson come and beg for some sort of affection towards you, in that case you would be really fucked in the head."

Jinyoung was once again interrupted by Yugyeom, angry and aggressive voice.

"But that's not it isn't? You like him don't you?"

Jinyoung heart may have stopped for a second.

Eyes wide and mouth slightly open, he turned towards Yugyeom, who was staring him down with a look full of anger and hatred.

Jinyoung sighed and got up from the couch.

Yugyeom instead was getting pretty impatient, and the only thing restraing him from beating Jinyoung ass was Jackson sleeping form on his lap.

"So, which is it, hyung?"  
That came off more as a threat than a question.

And if Jinyoung had to be honest, the maknae scared him, a lot.

Jinyoung sighed again and stopped the pacing he was busy doing around the room.

"Okay, you got me. I love him, so what?"

At that Yugyeom breath stopped in his throat.  
He already knew what it was that triggered Jinyoung in acting like this, but he kinda didn't want it to be real.  
Because they were stuck in a pretty bad situation.

"I still don't understand why would you treat him like that, what was the reason-"

The older grumbled under his breath and sat down again on the couch.  
His hands going through his hair and gripping lightly.

"It was just-, id didn't want him to know about my feelings, and you how i get with those type of stuff."

Yugyeom made a little noise of sympathy, all anger and annoyance towards the other was long gone.

"But why did you have to go that far?  
I mean, at times you were really harsh, that's why he stopped coming to you."

Jinyoung was starting to feel the guilt deep inside of him.  
'Cause Yugyeom was right, at times he was really harsh and rough.  
There were times when all Jackson wanted was a simple hug or even having him close to him, and Jinyoung would roll his eyes and walk away or push him away, hard, with some half-assed excuse.

And to think he did that with Jackson, who was naturally cuddly and bubbly, and on top of that he was the one he loved.  
He didn't deserve him.

"I mean, hyung, there were times where he would come to me on the verge of tears and just snuggle into me without saying anything but your name. I really wanted to slide from time to time. It was fucking unnecessary."

Jinyoung guilt was eating him alive.

"I know i fucked up, i just didn't know how to act, i-"

"It's fine JinJin."

Both heads turned towards the voice, Jackson's voice.

"Jackson-hyung i-"  
He stopped himself, realizing that he didn't know how to explain anything really.  
This was something he would've hoped to avoid for a really long time.  
And Yugyeom was not any better

His eyes were wide and slightly scared and his hand were completely off Jackson body.

They fucked up.

"For how time were you awake?" The older decided to take rhe situation in hand.  
As he spoke he used the usual soft and gentle tone he reserved for only the rapper, but the fear and anxiety in his voice could still be heard.

Jackson turned around in Yugyeom lap, now sitting with his back on Yugyeom large chest.

And it was obvious by the strained movements and the raspy voice that Jackson was still sleepy.

"The first thing i heard is, Yugyeom..."  
Jackson stopped as started fidgeting with his hands and a heavy blush coated his face.

"...I heard Yugyeom saying he likes me."  
Yugyeom visibly gulped and tried to speak, but instead he was cut off by Jackson again.

"I heard everything after that."  
With that his voice gained a slightly sadder tone and his eyes shifted towards Jinyoung, who was pretty he was about to have an heart attack.

"Jinyoung you were really mean, you know?  
The way you treated me hurt, a lot.  
A first i thought it was because maybe i was annoying, and you were simply tired of me."

How much Jinyoung wanted to throw himself out the window.

"But then Yugyeom always was willing to spend time with, he never pushed me away."

Yugyeom was the shade of a tomato.

"And now i finally know the reason behind it, for both of you."

Jackson lips slowly turned into a soft smile, he proceeded to sits himself in between with legs crossed.

He took both guy's bigger hands and held them.  
The owners of those hands were currently in utter confusion.

They first prepared for the worst response, now they didn't know what to expect from the smaller one.

But Jackson small voice broke all of those expectations.

"I love you too, both of you."

Jinyoung and Yugyeom simultaneously looked at each other with a dumb founded expression, bfore the realization of what Jackson had said hit them.

The jumped on Jackson, squishing his tiny self into a hug.  
A small giggle from the rapper made Yugyeom start peppering his face with kisses while Jinyoung rubbed his nose into his neck.

After that it was a whole lot of snuggling and cuddling until Jackson fell asleep again, squished between their bodies.

The rapper voice broke the comfortable silence with a soft request.

"Can we go to bed? 'm too sleepy and it's uncomfortable."  
He said before apparently falling asleep again. 

Yugyeom chuckled at Jackson cuteness while Jinyoung simply smiled, but a smile full of fondness.

"How are we gonna deal with this type of...thing?" 

Right, that had to be discussed.  
Jackson loved both of them, and they loved him.  
It would be a challenge, but they would make it work. 

"We will deal with it later, now let's get the baby to sleep."


	4. Eunwoo X Astro Pt.1 [Astro]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story contains little space and/or age regression luvs, if you don't fuck with it, you're very welcome to leave babez xxx

With the kind of dynamics Astro showed in public, you would think you had a pretty solid idea of the members personality and place in the group. 

This happens with literally every group. 

You have the maknae, who is usually categorized as the cute one that no one can resist to. Then you have the usual 'sunshine' or 'bubbly' person of the group who can cheer you up in the worst day. Opposite to that, you have the moody, serious one, who can be found quite and reserved most of the times, but when they speak they usually become your psychological support. 

And so on. 

But with Astro, it was a completely different story. 

What they showed on cameras was basically what the fans wanted to see. 

In fact, although they were used to Sanha being the 'baby' or the adorable one of the group, behind the scenes it was not him. 

It was Eunwoo. 

As surprising as it may sound, it wasn't really unexpected for the other members. 

Although the public had always seen Eunwoo as this cool, sexy, 'bad boy' type of guy, that was just what Eunwoo wanted to show to the public. 

He was really good at hiding his true self from people he didn't want to know. 

In fact, no one really knew about how he truly acted behind close doors, besides his members. 

The reason being, he was embarrassed to show how he really was, after all this time. 

Matter of fact, he didn't even want things to turn out like this. 

He didn't want people to see him as something he wasn't. 

But at the same time, what would've they thought once they saw a guy that appeared so tough and 'bad boy' like, act so _childish_? 

It kinda started during their pre-debut era, where videos of the guys started going around. 

They went all pretty viral on the internet, but those of Eunwoo specifically had gone crazy. 

In those particular videos Eunwoo always had 'badass' type of image and that was mainly caused by the endless insecurities he had at the time. 

The training period the company put the trainees through was really rough and exhausting and it definitely took a shot at Eunwoo. 

Not only that but it also caused him to have problems with how he looked, by being put through strict and harsh diet followed by some not so nice words by the staff and instructors. 

His talent for singing was constantly being put under the rug by the different coaches. 

His main focus was to be a really good dancer, but after entering the company, he absolutely despised it. He was constantly targeted by the other trainees and even the coaches. 

And it was because of something as futile, as his personality. 

At the time he was really young, and that brought out his innocence and overall bubbly persona out.

At the start he thought it would help him make friends, and appeal to the instructors. Because, no one would want a stone cold, emotionless shell for a trainee, right? 

Well, he was wrong. 

He later found out, that was exactly what the company and the fans seem to like and want. 

You could say, it was forced on him. 

He learned that by replacing a warm smile with a harsh glare, it didn't make people want to come near him and therefore, they couldn't hurt him. 

He even started working out, not that he could ever hurt someone, it was just to make sure that if they didn't feel threatened by the murderous look on his face, they would be terrified of his body. 

Then he did a full 180 with his personality. If he didn't have that innocent, sweet, generous and outgoing aura to him, the other trainees wouldn't feel the need to pick on him. He became rough, arrogant, _evil_ some people liked to call him. 

It helped him, but it also caused to slowly, but painfully fall apart.

He didn't want to be like this, he was forced to be this way. As much as he wanted to act tough and stern, the _real_ him was buried deep inside of his mind, and no matter how much he pushed that part away, it still came back. 

He expected that once he got older, he would finally be able to let go of the part of himself that made him want to be taken care of, that wanted things like plushies and stupid things like onesies, toys-

But it didn't. 

The urge was still there and it angered Eunwoo. It was almost like he _needed_ those things. 

Why couldn't he be normal? 

Why couldn't he be like what people thought of him? 

One time he searched about it and the fact that he actually got and explanation for him, made his blood go cold. 

Age-regression. 

_.... Is a coping mechanism used by people often with ptsd, anxiety, depression or simply any sort of childhood trauma/stress. Some regressors will regress back farther then others. Ways you could possibly tell someone is a regressor, Babbling/Slurring words, Doing childish activites, Pacifiers, Stuffies, Bottles, Thumb sucking-_

As as much as despised himself and that thing, he couldn't help but think that, at least for him, it was very appropriate. 

The amount of stress and anxiety the training period put him through was enough to make him break down every day.

With the instructors and coaches that put him through hell, constantly making sneaky remarks about him being just a model with little to no talent. 

Add in not so friendly trainees and you have hell on earth, at least for Eunwoo. 

But after finding out about the age-regression thingy, things for Eunwoo got a little bit better. 

He figured that things were already really fucking bad, how much worse could they get? 

So he decided to try and get into it, finding out about people called 'caregivers' that in his situation were definitely a big no. 

Even if he badly wanted someone to take of him like that, to treat him like something special. 

But it didn't matter how much he wanted something like that, it wasn't something remotely possible and he was certain no one even wanted someone like him as a little, so instead, he found comfort in other things. 

He started buying cute little stuffed animals, that helped him a lot with his sleeping problems. 

And they were also really cute so that was a plus. 

He started watching little kids shows, they helped him relax and push back all the things that tortured his poor mind day after day. 

He even bought some toys, not much, just a little blue car that made noise when you moved it, and three lego set, all different and pretty small but they helped him keep his mind at ease, so it didn't matter. 

But the things he absolutely loved was the food, especially all types of candies and sweets. 

Nothing comforted him more than a good, warm cup of milk followed by chocolate chips cookies. 

That was usually the thing that pushed him further into little space, making him completely forget about all the things that bothered him.

After particularly harsh days, (which were almost every single day), he usually fell asleep in little space, he just couldn't get himself to get out of the head space. 

It was like he physically couldn't, like his body didn't allow him to. 

And for those nights every thing was good, until the mornings after. 

He woke up with a headache, his previously floaty and relaxed state had been washed off leaving place for the depressing thoughts. He actually felt _worse_ than the day before, if that was even possible. But he learned, that littles should _always_ have caretakers when they drop, and when they xome out of the headspace, as the transition was a very delicate moment, and not done right it would stressful and hurtful to the little, often causing problems with the mental health of the little. And it had to be absolutely avoided if the little used littlespace for stress problems. 

So that explained everything.

But the aftermath did not matter, if Eunwoo could feel happy and light even for a moment, Eunwoo would take any risks 

And from that it was all pretty okay for him, until the company finally decided to make him debut, with a group. And with that, he had to move into a dorm with other five guys. 

And that destroyed everything. 

He couldn't freely leave the plushies he so much loved where he wanted anymore, that were there for him to snuggle into, any time he wanted. 

He couldn't play with his toys anymore, forced to hide them somewhere in the closet, almost impossible to see. 

And with that fake ass person he had, he couldn't _possibly_ let someone see him eat warm milk with frootloops, while watching Doraemon, it was stupid as all hell, but that's just how his brian worked. 

He fell once agian in a spiral of sadness and apathy. 

He was deprived of the only things that got him through the day, and he wasn't gonna let anybody see his real him, ever. 

He was used to people treating him like dirt, so why wouldn't the new guys be like that too? 

Though, lucky for him, the other members all came one by one to his saving. 

Once the company put them together with him, he felt like he was finally free. 

For some odd reason, he couldn't hide himself well enough from them, no matter how much he tried, no matter how much his mind told him that they were going to treat him as bad as the others before them. 

They were going to find out that the cold, fierce and confident Cha Eunwoo had the personality of a little kid, and ultimately make fun of him and overall treat him like shit. 

Surprisingly, it didn't happen. 

The more time he spent with them the more he found himself feeling safe, cared for, almost protected by their presence. 

And most importantly, he didn't have to hide from them. 

Although it wasn't exactly a thing he intended to do. 

At first he planned to hide himself just like the other times, but it seemed that with the members being around him effected him. He was not constantly on guard, he started being more relaxed and outgoing with them, causing him to dismiss the protective shell he put around himself. 

The members started picking up on different things Eunwoo did around them, subconsciously or consciously, and started observing the change in his behavior as more time passed. 

Myungjun, initially being in the same room as him, noticed the rather childish things Eunwoo did, especially during the night.

He noted evertime he saw Eunwoo hide a new kind plushie to his collection, in a big white box his closet. 

And when it was time to sleep, just before falling asleep he would see Eunwoo, not so quietly, reach into the closet and pull out on of the plushie, before settling in bed. 

And by what his eyes would catch, it seemed like Eunwoo would completely wrap himself and the covers around him, to almost hide the plushie. 

It was weird, 'cause if that was the case, he wondered why he would feel the need to hide something like that, especially considering that by thaf time, they were almost best friend. 

But the small number of times he woke up before him, he would find the sight of a sleeping Eunwoo with cheeks dusted with a light pink and messy hair, cuddled up to his plushie. 

It was honestly a burst of cuteness that Myungjun would have never expected from someone like Eunwoo. 

Tho the fact that someone apparently so tough and confident could be so adorable, honestly made the situation all more cuter. 

But he still remember that one time where Eunwoo literally freaked out, when Myungjun found one of his plushie on the floor. 

Myungjun would have understood if Eunwoo reacted like that because, for some reason, he didn't want people to touch his stuff. 

But what threw him off was that Eunwoo tried to act like it wasn't his, that he didn't even know _what object_ Myungjun was holding. 

When Myungjun asked if it was, in fact his plushie, he completely dismissed it by saying _'do i look like i would own something like that',_ all followed by a borderline disgusted look. 

And when Myungjun, being the good hyung he always tried to be, tried to tell him it was nothing to be ashamed of, if it really was his, Eunwoo snatched it out from his hand, and simply threw it in the trash. 

It was definitely weird but Myungjun decided to not bring it up again, and simply waited for Eunwoo to open up to him about something, anything that would explain his behavior. 

For Sanha it was kinda the same thing.

Being the maknae came with numerous advantages, one of them being constantly being taken care of and being spoiled by all of his hyungs. 

Eunwoo was not an exception, he was nothing but a great hyungs, especially to him. 

He would the first Eunwoo cooked for, he would always offer to pay for him, constantly making sure he was in shape, healthy, and if he was sick he would make sure he was excluded from every activity and that he was taken care of. 

The other would always argue that he was picking a favorite, but Eunwoo neither agreed or denied. 

And for a while, Sanha never wondered if something was going on with Eunwoo. 

After all, in his eyes Eunwoo was always cool, laid back and had an overall image of an alpha. Nothing and no one could have hurt him, but that is exactly where he went wrong.

There were times where they would be sitting on the couch cuddling with one another, and with corner of his eyes, he would be able to catch the longing look Eunwoo had on while watching them.

It always confused him because it was aknow fact, Eunwoo was not one up for any kinds of skinship, Eunwoo himself said it. 

But everytime they would snuggle together, hold hands, even feed each other, Eunwoo would always have this sad, heartbroken and almost _regretful_ look in his eyes, that was immediately hidden as soon as Eunwoo catched him staring. 

Fortunately Sanha didn't let that just slide, thinking it was just his imagination like most people would so, and actually started being more affectionate with his hyung.

At first he expected some kind of rejection, not that would stop him, but it never would expected it to be this easy. 

The first he barely had sort of negative reaction expect from confused glances and surprised looks. 

And then it became almost a routine. 

Sanha would grab his hand everytime they went together at practice, he always remembered to back hug him in the morning and snuggle into his snuck.

Sometimes Eunwoo would even allow him to peck him on the cheeks. 

He would immediately pick him to cuddle with on movie nights and he even allowed to feed him. 

Some would say it was weird, with Sanha being the maknae and all. 

But he would just lie if he said he didn't absolutely adore treating Eunwoo like that. 

He loved his reactions even more. 

He loved how Eunwoo hand would squeeze his much bigger hands from time to time. 

He loved how Eunwoo practically leaned into him, evertime he back-hugged him while he cooked. 

He loved the heavy blush that coated his cheeks when he kissed him on the cheek. 

And he absolutely _loved_ how small he made Eunwoo look in his arms when they cuddled. 

Although the heavy progress, Sanha still noticed how hesitant Eunwoo would be from time to time. 

It was almost like he couldn't allow himself to do that. 

And if that was the case, Sanha could not understand why he felt the need to do it. 

But he wouldn't risk to drive him away incase he asked him about it, so he just decided to wait for him. 

Driving him away was the last thing he wanted. 

Then there was Rocky. 

Even from the first times they worked as a group, Rocky wouldn't buy this whole act Eunwoo had going on. He had a met a couple of people like him and he was pretty sure about the reason why Eunwoo acted the way he did, but at the time they just recently had started being together and being actually friends, so he didn't want jump to conclusion. 

But he just couldn't let go of the feeling that was telling that he was, in fact, right so he decided to have a little talk with Eunwoo. 

Needless to say that it ended up pretty bad, with Eunwoo saying he needed to mind his own business, followed by a door in his face, and not by talked by him for a week. 

After that, Eunwoo shut Rocky off, and that was enough proof for Rocky to ensure himself that he was right. 

But with what happened, he didn't want to upset Eunwoo further and he actually waited for Eunwoo facade to slip, so Rocky could show him that he could trust him, no matter what. 

And this time it went to his favor. 

The times that Eunwoo stayed with Rocky in the practice room, to go over the many routines they had to do for the comebacks, Rocky started to pick up on little things Eunwoo did. 

It was mostly when they were close to finish the dance and they were exhausted, especially Eunwoo, as he was on the verge of falling asleep. 

Everytime Rocky told him to repeat a missed step, or a off-beat move, Eunwoo pouted in the most adorable way, his eyes that were usually sharp and fierce would resemble those of a puppy.

It actually killed Rocky a little bit of the inside, because he knew that Eunwoo got exhausted pretty quickly, and being the least experienced dancer between them, didn't help the case. 

And when Rocky usually told him that he had to do the moves, the other would almost whine in a child-like way and tell him _'But i'm tired MinMin'_ with a tone of voice that practically had Rocky coo everytime he heard it. 

He also find out that when he was tired, like tired tired, Eunwoo would become a totally different person. 

His regular cold, stern, and sharp voice was replaced by a soft, endearing, quite voice that had a childish twist to it. 

Even his behavior changed, and Rocky noticed here too, it once again resembled one of a child. 

He rubbed his eyes with his two little fist, he waddled and was constantly on the verge of falling and he also became _really_ clingy.

The first times Rocky stayed with him at the practice room, and they finally got to go home, he usually just tended to walk really close to Rocky and after a while he would grip his hand, and didn't let go until they got home.

As time passed he started with the hugs, demanding to be carried by Rocky on his back, claiming he was too tired, then he proceeded to cling to the other like a koala.

And to Rocky, it was.....strange.

Don't get him wrong, he definitely liked this side of Eunwoo, he thrived in the attention he got from his hyung, even if it was limited to when he was to tired to do anything.

But the change in behavior was definitely something to keep on the lookout.

For Moonbin, it was a whole different story.

His relationship with Eunwoo was, _peculiar_ , to say the least.

The did not hate each other, in fact Moonbin quite liked the older, it was just that Moonbin found Eunwoo hard to befriend.

Although he knew almost everyone thought that, Eunwoo made it practically a mission for Moonbin to get him to have a conversation with him, without cutting him off immediately and walking away from him. 

Moonbin thought maybe the older just didn't like him, or maybe they just weren't made to be friends. 

But then, Eunwoo would always choose him to help him with vocal practice in studio sessions, when they had to go to the grocery store late at night he strictly went to search for Moonbin and demanded his company.

And that really fucked with his head, as he was stuck with constantly switching on what to do with the older. 

And that was how it went for a couple of months, a costant push and pull kind of thing between them. 

That is until a dreadful event that completely switched everyone's vision on Eunwoo. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to post part 2 by the end of next week, expect another oneshot in the meantime.  
> May or may not be Ateez, who knows.


	5. Jaehyun x Jungwoo [Nct]

Yuta was angry. 

He was really fucking angry. 

Oh sorry, my bad. 

He IS angry. 

And the cause of this anger is a little adorable but sexy human by the name of Mark.

And you may be wondering, what could Mark possibly have done, to deserve his anger? 

Well, the problem isn't exactly Mark, but a certain someone who is trying to take Mark away from him.  
Not that Mark belongs to him, but he delusionaly likes to believe so. 

That is because Yuta is in fact in love with Mark, like love.

But unfortunately, Yuta is scared to tell him about his feelings, as he's too afraid of Mark response.  
Everytime he would even remotely think about telling him, his mind would always come up with the most crazy scenario, making Yuta feelings back down. 

So he just lives with these little but pleasing things Mark does, making him live constantly in a bittersweet mood. 

Sometimes Mark would go directly towards him, sit in his lap and cuddle up till he falls asleep with his head gently placed on his chest.  
Other times he would do simpler things like kiss Yuta on the cheek, hug him out of nowhere.  
Topping all of it with an innocent smile, not knowing what he is causing inside of Yuta. 

But there is one thing he absolutely love.

When Mark ask him to sleep with him. 

The cause of this are several nightmares that little Mark has and for some reason the only thing that seem to work, is to cuddle up against Yuta. 

He would waddle all the way to Yuta room with his old but still cute teddy bear, where Yuta is more than willing to hold him in his arms, in order to make sure his Mark is sleeping safe and sound. 

Don't get him wrong, he surely enjoys all the attention and love he gets from the younger. But there's one bad thing about all of this. 

Yuta has to restrain himself from doing things, that are not exactly appropriate, to the rapper. 

He can't blame anyone, because he put himself in this predicament. 

But this past couple of weeks, Mark slowly drifted aways form him. 

Yuta doesn't receive any of his loving and warm hugs.  
He doesn't get any of his sloppy kisses. 

He doesn't sit on his lap. 

He doesn't even come to his room at night. 

And that is because of a man. 

Yuta just has to resist until Mark realizes that he doesn't need another man in his life. 

All he need is Yuta. 

And then he will be back in Yuta's lap, where he belongs to. 

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

Considering that everyone was out doing something, including Mark, Yuta had to find something to do.  
So he figured he'd go to dance studio to practice for their upcoming comeback. 

After practicing and making sure he was satisfied with the outcome he decided to go back to the dorms.  
He was tired and was ready to have a hot bath.  
Usually he was would've been way more excited to go home, because Mark would always come running towards him every time he got home.

But now all his attention is towards Kyle. 

He learned the boy's name when he saw Mark texting him.

And Yuta just really couldn't understand what was so special about him. 

What did Mark find in him?  
Kyle is such a basic name too, Yuta is much cuter.

With those thoughts running through his head, he packed up his things and made his way to the exit. 

He began walking but as he was about to arrive to the elevator, he heard a shuffling noise behind him.

It was so late and he was pretty sure he was the only one he came to practice at this late at night.  
Confusion took over his face. 

His eyes began scanning the surrounding and he heard it again.  
It came from the rap practice room. 

Yuta overdramatic mind ,of course, immediately thought of thieves.  
In fact that would be the perfect place to steal, considering that place was packed with expensive stuff. 

So he decided to be a brave boy, and with his breath becoming heavier he stepped towards the door of the studio.  
Much to his surprise, it was already open, so all he did was grab the handle and push it open. And that didn't help at easing Yuta's mind about the thieves situation. 

What he found in that room unfortunately, weren't thieves. 

There was Mark. 

Precisely there was Mark, pinned against the wall by Kyle. 

And they were kissing. 

He stared at the two for a few seconds, his hand trembling and heart beat on a thousand.  
Tears started running on his face when he finally took everything in. 

He had lost Mark. 

And he had no one to blame but himself, he definitely went somewhere wrong to make Mark run to another guy. 

The two still didn't notice him, to busy getting at each other so Yuta not so quietly made his way out, slamming the door behind him. 

He pratically ran out of the bulding, with the image of the two stuck in his mind.

When he finally arrived to the dorms,  
he just busted through the door, paying no attention to the other guys sitting in the living room, he went straight tk his bedroom and locked himself in. 

Meanwhile the others, Johnny, Taeil and Doyoung were very confused.  
They couldn't pick up much, considering the fact that all they saw was Yuta busting through the door and running by them, not even sparing them a glance. 

But Doyoung noticed something.  
He was pretty sure he catched Yuta's face, red and wet with tears. 

He had never seen Yuta cry, or even tear up a bit, at least him, so the situation was very strange to say the least. 

He glanced towards the other members, finding confused looks on both of them. 

They were all silently deciding if they should do something or just leave him alone for a bit, but they fortunately opted for the first one. 

One by one they stood up and began walking towards Yuta's room, Doyoung in the front. 

They could all faintly hear the sound of muffled cries coming from the room, concerning the others even more, especially Doyoung.

He was determined on understanding what was going on with him, he'd never experienced such behavior from Yuta.

He brought his hand up and gently knocked on the door, it wasn't long before the door opened.


	6. Mark X Kai Pt.1 [SuperM]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this chapter contains mention of littlespace, little mark gone be present the next chapter so don't worry.

If you asked Mark, who was one of his favorite hyung, the answer would one hundred percent be Kai.

And if you spent even just one day with them, it wouldn't be too much of a surprise.

It was obvious that Mark had a special _something_ when it came to his relationship with Kai. 

And anybody could tell that it was like this from Kai side too. 

It was clear as day that the tall dancer had an enormous soft spot for the little rapper. 

They had a bond that just the two of them could understand. 

The would always argue with each other about who Mark preferred but in the bottom of their heart, as much as it hurt to say it, even they could admit that they couldn't compete with Kai.

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

It was like that practically from the beginning.

Mark always admired the older, Kai was truly Mark's idol. 

He looked after him so much, that Kai was actually part of the reason that made the younger want to be an idol. 

He thought about being in the studio, writing music, producing music, being in music video and looking just as cool as Kai did. 

Performing in front of huge audiences just like Kai, holding huge concerts and having so many people love you and look after you. 

And he thought about the fact that maybe, he was going to be able to see Kai, by being in the same company. 

And he was in fact able to see him and interact with him, even before debuting. 

Cheesy scenarios always came to mind everytime he would cross path with Kai and the older would even just _glance_ his way. 

And like that wasn't enough, out of nowhere, Kai started acknowledging him whenever they saw each other, no matter what place. 

If he had practice and Kai was in the practice room before he would look at him with the most gentle of smile and wave his way with on of those excessively big hands, to which he almost never responded to, being always struck thinking about the fact that Kai was even looking at him-

But what was really important was when Kai actually stopped and made his way out of whatever he was doing just to _talk_ to him. 

From time to time Kai would go to the dance practice room to take part in the choreography for their monthly evaluation, and the older would stop everything with some half-assed excuse, and go straight to Mark all smiley and kind and gentle and too hot for little Mark to handle. 

But he still handled it, 'cause he obviously fucking loved it. 

Who wouldn't? Having your idol come to you with a big smile, that Mark liked to believe it was secretly only for him, asking you how was your day and being overly concerned and really caring. 

Wich was another thing, Mark _adored_. 

The older was always asking if he slept enough, and if, God forbid, Mark said no, Kai would go on an endless lecture about how important sleep is, how he shouldn't overwork himself and even going as far as threatening to beat up someone in case Mark was getting to overworked.

He would always ask him if he was eating. 

Talking about how he needed to eat to be healthy, but also because the older apparently loved how chubby and soft Mark could get, if he was eating enough. 

That would always make Mark a blushing and stuttering mess, which provoked ulterior cooing from the older. 

He couldn't say he hated it, though. 

Ever since their little thing started, Mark discovered that he adored being taken care of, the way Kai did, and maybe a little bit more too. 

A bit more than a _grown up_ would. 

See, right from the start, what Mark liked the mkst about Kai, was his feel-good kind of presence.

No matter whatever the fuck Kai was saying or doing, when he was with him, he always made Mark feel so _safe_.

Maybe it was how soft the smiles he gave him were, or maybe how he always talked to him with so much gentleness .

Maybe it was the way Kai looked at him with so much fondness and love.

Or maybe it was just because of how protective and caring Kai was with him.

Mark just couldn't help but bask in the attention he received from the older. 

Kai just made him feel so good and relaxed. 

But he couldn't help the feeling of wanting even more. 

From time to time he would catch himself staring at Kai's, that were so big and looked so strong, and looked like they could pick up Mark without a struggle.

And then he would wonder what it would've felt like to have to wrapped around him, to have them pick him and carry him around, staying safe between them. 

Sometimes when they were sitting somewhere, Mark's eyes would wander to the older's lap, which in comparison to him was so big and he was sure it was the perfect size for him to curl up and go to sleep. 

And for an eighteenth years old boy, these thoughts weren't something normal, according to Mark. 

The feeling of needing to be taken care of, to be carried around, even to be fed by someone else, were thoughts that constantly run through his mind. 

It was almost like he transformed into a fucking kid everytime he was with Kai. 

And those thoughts weren't stopping, they only grew and grew the more Kai was around him. 

So like anyone else would in this situation, he decided to search about it. 

And when he actually found out what was going on with him, he had one or two breakdowns. 

As much as it relieved him to know that he wasn't the only one like that, and that it actually was a thing, he couldn't help but feel like there was something wrong with him. 

Like an illness.

He read that usually age-regression, that's how it was called, was caused by stress, past-traumas and other things like that. 

The gag was that Mark, didn't have any sort of traumas recalling his childhood and, although the training period was pretty stressing, it wasn't excessively stressing. 

And he kind of felt like he didn't need to regress or whatever was it called, that he didn't deserve it. 

He told himself that he was selfish for wanting something like that. 

But then he found out more about it. 

He found out about things called triggers.

These triggers could variety from objects, people, places and even feelings, that usually brought an individual head space to in fact, trigger.

If it was with people, the trigger most of time would always rely on touches and feelings, that would send said individual on a spiral of emotions that was almost overwhelming.

This symbolized that one individual was touch starved.

This occurred when someone was having little to zero physical contact with other people, leaving them basically needing the touch and care of someone else. 

And this was a trigger, because it brought them back to their childhood were, usually, someone was always being taken care of.

And with that, Mark couldn't argue. 

Since he moved to Korea and joined the company, he didn't really have much time for even friends, let alone a relationship. 

Apart from the fact that after moving to Korea he began losing all of his friends, he wasn't really the best at making friends.

He was shy, timid, he stuttered when he got overwhelmed and his slight anxiety didn't make it any better.

So just talking to him was a pain in the ass, and he liked to think that his poor looks weren't exactly inclined to attract people to him.

His situation only got worse with the training periods taking up most of his time, giving him zero chances to befriend someone.

But that stopped when Kai first made his way into his life.

And for a little bit, everything felt good, aside from his little problem.

Kai made him feel warm, loved, happy and many other things, that he never felt before.

But, because of his 'problem', Mark always felt stuck within himself, almost blocked from going all the way out with Kai.

Even Kai told him countless times that he could trust him with anything, that he always had someone to go to if he felt some type of way, but no matter how much he tried, he just couldn't help but reveal his little side to Kai.

'Cause who wouldn't find that fucking weird? Especially from someone like _him_?

He knew that Kai was not the type of person to judge over something like that, but his mind constantly told him something else.

That even if Kai didn't have a problem with it, who in the hell would want to take care of him?

Who would want him?

He had found some other Littles by messing around on the internet, and they looked nothing like him.

Mark found himself to be the exact opposite of how Littles were supposed to look like. 

Usually littles were adorable, cute, tiny, not so fucking skinny, they were interesting and easy to be around, and they usually were pleasurable to take care of. 

With Mark, that was not possible. 

He was awkward, he was definitely _not_ cute or adorable or anything good to look at, he was too skinny and lacked the chubby factor that Mark learned caregivers loved. 

And he was most definitely a pain in the ass to be around considering his anxiety and lack of social skills. 

He was a mess to make it simple, and he was sure no one wanted to deal with him. 

He could only imagine how much worse he could get regressed into a younger head space. 

But if he was able to have Kai around to make him feel so fuzzy and giddy inside, he was okay with being constantly on verge of slipping. 

Even if he knew he couldn't fully regress. 

And yes, he knew that would be really fucking bad for his health, but he was willing to risk it. 

And his little moment lasted until he finally got to debut in a group, which was NCT. 

And don't get him wrong, he was super fucking grateful, but with that, came the fact that he wouldn't be able to see Kai as much. 

And that meant that he wouldn't be able to even make it to the verge of slipping. 

No more warm smiles, no more safe hugs, no more caring and sweet talks, no more feeling good with himself, no more Kai. 

Some would say he was being over dramatic. He would still be able to see Kai on a regular, right? 

Well, that would've been a possibility, if only NCT popularity hadn't skyrocketed almost immediately. 

And that came with more fans, more fans that wanted more music, more concerts and performances that transformed into literal months of training and getting ready for new comebacks. 

And they had multiple comebacks per year. 

And all of that translated into Mark having barely time to even catch a break. 

And apart from that, Kai being so popular, had his own thing going on, between partnerships, photoshoot, variety shows. 

He didn't have time to look after Mark. 

And even if he knew it wasn't anybody's fault but his own, he couldn't help but feel sad, crushed, dead on the inside. 

And the the very few times Mark had free time, he was to worn out and just tired to do anything, and he knew that part of that was because he hadn't regressed, for like ever. 

Even if he didn't fully regress with Kai, he still managed to feel relaxed and stress free, but now he couldn't even have that. 

And add to that, the feeling of not being able to be near the only persone that made you feel good and happy the past few years of your life. 

And it wasn't anybody's fault, just his own and of his dumb, weird.... _thing_ he had going on. 

There was no time or space for his stupid littlespace, he just had to focus on working, making his fans happy and making his many hyung proud. 

And the last one, became quickly a real problem for Mark. 

Mark was one of those people who absolutely thrived in praises and compliments, and having several hyungs constantly praising him, telling him 'proud they are of him', definitely did something to him, both good and bad. 

On the good side, he always had the motivation to do even better. 

Write better verses, improve his dancing more and more along with his stage presence and that helped him and NCT gain a lot of popularity, so he was definitely happy about it.

Not to mention that his little side basked in the affection the other members showed to him, and while it wasn't as pleasant and 'stress-relieving' as when Kai did it, it was definitely something. 

But on the bad side, the praised and compliments kind of got to his head. 

It made him believe that if he got even a little bit of a break from practicing and working, he didn't deserve what he had. 

He told himself that he was being lazy and ungrateful, and that he was never to good for all the things he had. 

And that if didn't work hard enough, everyone would be disappointed in him. 

His fans always expected so much from him, and they would be so disappointed if they saw him. 

All of his hyungs and members praises wouldn't be for him anymore, if they found out he was slacking and not working. 

_Kai_ would be disappointed.

And he couldn't have that. 

And that was the start of it. 

Soon he started putting work over everything and everyone, and even his own healt. 

And while it sure as hell wasn't great before, it only got worse. 

He often forgot to eat, he would run on very little sleep for weeks at times and when he would, obviously, get sick because of this, he would always brush it off.

He was slowly deteriorating in front of everyone eyes, he was becoming almost like a robot.

No feelings whatsoever, focused only on his tasks and being 'perfect'.

But fortunately, (or unfortunately?) for him, the members started noticing more as time passed and took action. 

Yuta noticed how even more skinny, pale and lifeless he was becoming.

He noticed the dark bag under his eyes, that lacked that sparkle of joy they always carried.

He noticed he always made up lame excuses to skip meals and if he did eat something, he always ran to the bathroom and locked himself in doing God knows what.

He doesn't even remember how many times he tried to get him to eat. 

Offering random snacks here and there, claiming he did not like something and tried to give to him so it wouldn't go to waste.

But nothing and he was running out of ideas. 

Donghyuck noticed how he always seemed so exhausted and worn out.

He would always catch him nod off and on the verge of falling asleep, only for Mark to wake himself up, and not in the most pleasant and stable of ways.

He noticed numerous times how every time Mark was about to fall asleep, he pinched himself on the arms, gripping his thighs so hard Donghyuck was sure he had endless bruises, or even giving himself slaps on the cheek, but that was when he thought no one was around.

Donghyuck tried endless time to try to make it go to sleep, to take care of him. But the more he tried the more Mark pushed him away.

Johnny noticed that he started spending more and more time in the practice room and in the studio, barely coming out of it. 

A number of times some he had to come drag him out of it, and he succeeded, but only the times he passed out from tiredness or if he hadn't locked himself inside of it. 

And it was really fucking weird. 

At first he thought that maybe he just didn't want to be around them, that he didn't like them, and that he was just trying to shut them out, but it obviously wasn't the case. 

Of course at first, Mark was closed off, shy and timid, but then, as times passed, he became a ball of sunshine. 

He loved every single one of them and they loved him back. 

So Johnny thought about it, and started placing pieces together. 

The amount of times he came home at late at night, drenched in sweat and on the edge of passing out, obviously because of the amount of hours he spent practicing.

How he always looked so angry every time he ate more than he was 'supposed to'. 

How he always looked so mad every time he got a move wrong,when he botched a part of his rap, or when he occasionally slept in a couple of more minutes. 

But all of those emotions, were all towards himself. 

And then Johnny figured it out. 

All the things he did, it was sort of a _punishment_ for himself.

Everytime he would spend more time to get the choreography right, he would come home late at night, and you wouldn't have been able to catch him eat for all of the next day.

And that wasn't even it.

There were so many things wrong with the way Mark behaved, that Johnny was terrified of what was going to happen.

He just didn't know what to do about it.

And lastly, Taeyong noticed how _fake_ Mark acted around everyone. 

He started noticing a little late than he would have liked it to, 'cause he felt like if he noticed it before, he could have done something. But he wasn't so sure that he could have done much now.

Mark was basically acting like a fucking robot. 

A _machine_ , set to do things, but not because he enjoyed it, but became he had too. 

And not allowing himself a little bit of a break, otherwise he would've have been shut down. 

That's how Taeyong was able to describe Mark. 

It was almost like Mark couldn't afford to show any type of emotions in terms of works, otherwise they would have gotten in the way. 

And that became gradually more obvious. 

It came to a point where you would look into Mark eyes, and it felt like no one was looking back. 

It was fucking scary. 

And the only things Mark seemed to feel, when it was just them together, was tiredness, and boredom. 

But Taeyong had a feeling he wasn't bored of them, he was bored of everything in general. 

Of how life was turning out for him. 

And Taeyong felt like a shit leader, for not being able to know what to do. 

And it was like this for a while. 

Taeyong talked about it with all the members and they tried everything. 

They didn't want to stand there and watch their best friend, their brother, crumble in front of their eyes. 

So they decided to have a talk with him. 

It started with them saying all kinds of reassuring, loving and sweet things to him to try and make him explain what was going on. 

They even had to use some cheesy ass lines, that although they were absolutely true and they meant every single thing, it was just cringy. 

And that apparently was what Mark needed, when he broke into the loud laughter they all missed so fucking much. 

Now Mark ended up telling them how he was feeling, and it ended up with most of them crying and bawling their eyes out, 'cause that is how much they cared for him and loved him. 

And although they kind of knew what to do, they all still felt like there were something that Mark was hiding. 

But they couldn't complain, it will come with time. 

So the talk that no one had faith in, expect for Taeil and Taeyong, being to one's who suggested it, actually worked. 

Mark started to interact more with all of them, always trying to talk and joking with them, even about the stupidest shit. 

He was still a bit awkward and stiff, but he was doing his best. 

He still lived rent free in the studio and practice room but at least he came home at a decent time. 

And lastly he tried to eat more. 

He was still not eating enough to keep him healthy, but with their help, especially Doyoung and Jaehyun, he managed to eat something every dat, instead of going days without touching a speck of food. 

They were quite proud of how things came out, but they were still disappointed in the fact that, Mark just would not tell them everything. 

They were there was a reason, but it made most of them feel like shit.

If Mark didn't want to tell them what was wrong, he obviously didn't trust them enough to do so.

And that kind stung. 

But for Mark, everything changed when he heard, that he was going to be in a super group. 

He would've definitely complained about the fact that he was in every damn unit, but then, he heard that they would pick members from other groups too. 

And one of them was Kai. 

Useless to say, that when Mark heard that, he went in overdrive. 

He glitched, something broke in his system, _ERROR_404_ , type of shit. 

He didn't how to act, how and what he was feeling, but he was sure about one thing. 

He would finally see Kai again, in person. 

Talk to him again, laugh and joke with him, eat with him, go out with him, hug him-

And then, the excitement and joy fullness of the moment quickly disappeared. 

_What if Kai forgot about me?_

_I mean, i changed a lot from when we last talked, there's a chance he won't recognize me-_

_But even if he recognizes me, who the hell is telling me he would want to talk to me again?_

_He probably realized how fucking weird i was, and is probably disgusted and wouldn't even want to see me-_

These kind of thoughts came back inside his mind like they owned the place. 

They would not let him breath one damn second and although deep inside of him he knew Kai would never do that, the thought was still there. 

And that was Mark's situation for a couple of weeks before they had their first meeting regarding the 'super group' , or better called SuperM. 

But on the day of the meeting, it was a different story. 

He was on the verge of having a breakdown, either from being nervous or overly excited, he really couldn't tell.

He was worrying about his weight, the way his face looked, what to wear 'cause he definitely wanted to make a good impression, but then he was worried they needed some kind of 'check up performance' to see if he really was cut out to be in the group and he wondered just how the hell was he going to perform in front of Kai-

It was a lot.

But the cherry on top, was that his little side was just as excited as he was.

At some point he had managed to lock his little side in the furthest place of his mind, but that day, he managed to escape. 

Mark sworn he never felt the urge to be little as much as that day.

Literally the littlest of the thing was triggering into falling into the head space.

From the warmth of the bed, the rainbow colored cereals he had that morning, to just thinking about the fact he was going to meet Kai.

And he wondered how the actual fuck was he going to be able to pull through without slipping and jumping Kai.

But, fortunately, he was able to contain himself. 

The merit went mostly all to Kai. 

As soon as he saw him, he disregarded everything and everyone and embraced the younger in a bone crushing hug, whispering sweet nothings into Mark's ear in attempt to smother his tears, that inevitably came down. 

While everyone knew of the close friendship they had before Mark debuted, the other six guys in that room, felt like they shouldn't have been there. 

They knew they had a bond together, but they didn't expect the bond to be so strong and so endearing. 

And when Mark suddenly bust into tears as soon as Kai embraced was definitely a shock, almost as shocking as Kai beginning to mumble sweet things into Mark's ear while placing little kisses all over Mark's face.

It was.... _different_. 

But it was so wholesome and heart warming, at least to Taemin and Ten, who watched the whole thing with sickening sweet smiles on their face. 

After their little moments, they obviously had to began spending more time together, and to other members of SuperM, it was like watching a cheesy ass movie, of two long lost lovers, finally getting back together.

And, regardless of which members were around them, they would always notice how different they acted around each other. 

With Kai, they noticed the instant change in behavior as soon as Mark came, (once again), in Kai's life. 

It was like Mark ignited something inside of Kai, that just brought so much out of him. 

Every time Mark would appear, Kai's behavior changed like a switch. 

He would treat him with so much care and attention, it was like he was treasuring Mark. 

Like Mark was something that would crumble in front of their eyes. 

He would always make sure he was the first one to order when they were eating out, sometime he would feed him too if he deemed Mark too tired. 

And on rare occasion, when Mark was too sleepy to even care about what was going on, they would catch him sneaking more and more food in Mark's plate, and making sure he ate every single one of them. 

When Taeyong asked him about it he claimed that Mark was still growing up and he needed to put more weight on him, and that back in the pre-debut days Mark's had the most 'adorable baby face', and cheeks so 'pinch-able' he would have cried. 

And that he didn't like how thin and small he had become. 

There was never a time where Kai didn't worry about Mark's eating habits.

And it was understandable, Mark could get at a pretty dangerous state if you didn't deliberately said something to him, it was almost like even Mark himself was aware he was skipping meals. 

One time, when he found out Mark's skipped almost a full week of eating, 

He went _crazy_. 

He went on about how, even living with Mark for so much time, and obviously knowing about his self destructive and unhealthy habits, they could let him get to that point. 

And he was right. 

They lived with the rapper for so long and they came to know with his problems in many different bad ways. 

So for them to be disregarding not seeing Mark eat, not one time, was a rather reckless and stupid move. 

Needless to say Kai almost beat their assess, before bringing Mark to his dorm, and he made him stay there for two weeks, until he deemed he was safe enough to return to them. 

And that was just one of the many other things Kai did for Mark and only Mark. 

Kai would, from time to time, come to pick him after practice, making sure he ate and slept the deserved amount. 

He would occasionally bring him to his place if Mark was too tired, or if Mark just wanted to stay with him. 

It was a win win situation anyway. 

And the list goes on.

It was like Kai had this side reserved just and only for Mark. 

And it's not like Kai could've disagree. 

And even after all of that, Mark still wouldn't allow himself to be happy. Meanwhile he was definitely happy the older did not just forget about him, and that he was still acting so overwhelmingly caring and sweet towards him, he couldn't help but feel like it was something he _shouldn't_ enjoy. 

That it was not right of him to feel that way, that he was being _selfish_ , that he was so ungrateful, even if he already had all kinds of good things. 

He already had so much, from money to fame, endless opportunities...

So why, on top of all of that, would he deserve all that attention, care and love from Kai.

He was being selfish.

He was not a fucking baby, he didn't need to be taken care of like that, it just wasn't right.

For Kai and for him.

He just had to learn to grow the fuck up, and act like a fucking _adult_ for once.

And to start, he was going to start with slowly removing Kai out of his life, even just a little bit, enough to make him snap out of, whatever that was.

As much as it killed him. 


	7. June X Bobby [Ikon]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW//:
> 
> This story contains attempted suicide, it's very angsty, but it get's better towards the end. I'm not a sad end type of bitch

June leaned on the railings of the big bridge he was on.  
His swollen and tired eyes gazed at the dark sky above him, currently was filled with little shining dots. 

Stars, just like him. 

June was a star, a singer, an idol, to some even a god.  
As of right now his success and fame was unmatched, everybody knew him.  
Even if you didn't like him, his name was surely running through your mind at least once a day. 

When he released his debut album, he would've never expected it would skyrocket him to such a high place.  
Just his debut by itself was almost  
legendary. 

Pure rock was not something in the K-pop world, you could say he brought something new, and people surely appreciated that. 

Milions on milions of copies sold, breaking record after record, sold out concerts, dominating charts, he had it all. 

He never would've imagined that at the age of 19 years old, he would have achieved this much, and doing something he absolutely loved. 

So what brought June, at the edge of bridge?

Love. 

It was love.

Everyone loved him, but he felt alone. 

He had everything, but he felt like he had nothing. 

He was so hollow and empty, that at times he couldn't even tell if he was alive, if he was still on this world.  
He was simply existing, he was not living. But no matter how much the sadness and emptiness swallowed him, no one was still able to tell if something was wrong with him He was so good, too good at hiding it. 

Every time he would have to go in public, he became a different person. 

It was like a switch.

The smiles, the sweet, loving voice, the adorable and funny attutide that made people fall in love with him, was destroyed when he was alone. 

That perfect facade crumbled once he got out of the public eye. 

That plastic smile was replaced by an emotionless, blank face.  
That voice that everyone loved and adored was tore apart by the costant crying.  
And lastly the signature attitude that made people fall in love with him, was buried deep inside of him by all kinds of pills he used to numb the feeling of nothingness and loneliness that continued to haunt him. 

That probably was the thing that struck him the most. 

How lonely and forgotten he felt, even after having the whole world practically in his hands.

He truly had no one, he was on his own.

All of his friends slowly drifted away from him once he got famous. And now he struggled to befriend anyone.  
Everyone he met since the start of his career didn't give a single fuck about him, all they wanted was a slice of fame.  
They didn't care about him, they cared about what he had. 

His family abandoned him too.  
As soon as they heard what career he wanted to pursue, they made sure to say and do everything in their power to bring down June dream. 

'You're never going to make it' 

'You're going to end up in the streets' 

'You're worthless dreams are going to be the end of you' 

But no matter what they said, June kept pushing through their words.  
He did not want to give up on doing what he loved, he was going to make it work. He was going to prove them wrong. 

And surprise, he made it. 

He made it, he did not end up in the streets. 

His dream came true, but unfortunately his family was right about something. 

His dream indeed ended up being the end of him. 

In the end, his dream became his own personal nightmare.  
And in the end, his love tore him apart. 

Unfortunately, he was back to the reality, by a cold drop or water, hitting his nose. 

He raised his head, exhausted eyes staring up at the dark clouds that were slowly covering everything above him.

A sigh left his mouth, he grabbed the old railing and jumped ending up on the other side, his feet barely standing on edge of the bridge. 

His hands let go of the railing, he raised his head and closed his eyes, letting the rain gently crash on him.

For the first time, he came to like rain. 

He was no longer crying alone. 

A small smile formed on his face.

He was finally going to happy, he was finally going to escape. 

Heavy began pouring from his eyes, blending with the rain that was softly coming down on him. 

A steady breath left his mouth, giving a last look to the dark sky... 

He jumped.  
——————————————————

"Fuck, come on, wake up!"

To June, this sentence arrived as a distant, muffled noise.  
He could sense everything around him, but all the noises were blocked.  
Almost like there was something inside of him, keeping everything away from him. 

'Am i dead yet?' 

That was pushed aways by a sudden pounding against his chest.  
It was steady and with every single one, June could feel something run inside of him, trying to get out. 

"Come on, please, open your fucking eyes!"

Within the many noises clouding his head, one was getting more and more clear by the second and he could finally identify it. 

It was water.

The river... 

"Wake up, fuck!"

June started hearing again, as the pounding on his chest became stronger. 

He heard a voice, a male voice.

'Someone was trying to save him?'

With this, there was a last pound and June began spitting out water, making breathing possible again. 

He got up from where he was laying, his coughing starting to stop. 

He tried to get up, failing as a strong pain to his head began ringing in his head making him fall, only to be immediately catched by two strong arms.

Whoever was with him, brought him to his chest, obviously seeing what state the other was.  
And it was not good.  
June was drenched from head to the ground in water, ice cold water, considering the fact that it was the middle of winter.  
And because of that the singer was shivering like a leaf.  
He was pretty sure he would be sick for the for the next 3 months, at best. 

"Don't push yourself, I got you."  
A gentle but rough voice whispered into June's ear, and the drenched boy let himself rest against his chest. Although he wouldn't have been the most safe of the options, June couldn't care less.  
He was on the verge of having hypothermia and the rather large chest he was currently leaning on was pleasantly warm. 

Plus, the stranger saved him from drowning, or technically he saved him from killing himself.  
But that's beside the point. 

The fact is, that if the stranger wanted to kill him, he wouldn't have bothered to bring him back to life. 

To shake them out of their thoughts, which were far from similar, was a sudden and quite sneeze. 

"'M sorry, i think i ruined your shirt."  
June dry and raspy voice put the dreading silence to and end.  
He was trying to lighten the situation, And he clearly didn't succeed considering the stranger was still staring at him, eyes filled with worry and something June couldn't quite point out. 

The stranger began taking off his leather jacket, his eyes staying glued on June trembling form.  
Once the jacket was in his hand, he took a step towards June, wrapping the big jacket around him. Doing all of this under the singer questioning eyes. 

"W-wh-". June stumbled over his own words, not knowing what to say.  
To other people this gesture may have felt normal, considering the fact that June took a swim in the middle of winter and the stranger was just trying to keep him alive.  
But June couldn't help but think there was another reason behind his actions. 

"We need to get you to an hospital. You look like you're about to pass out-".  
June opened his mouth the other didn't give him a chance. "-and you're not in a position to argue right now." 

June sighed and began shrugging off the jacket. "Listen, I'm alright. I can't t-thank you enough for saving me" not really "-but really i'm f-fine now."  
He finished, mentally cursing himself for stuttering.  
He then handed the man his giant black jacket.

The tall man hesitantly took back the jacket, raising his eyebrow, clearly not believing him.  
His serious face shifted into a one of simpathy and worry. 

"Look, i saw you jump off the bridge and knowing who you are, you're obviously not fine."  
The man finished stepping slowly forward June. 

The other didn't notice, as he dragged his hands down his face.  
He was exhausted, he really was on God bad side huh?

A heavy sigh slipped past his lips, he dropped his hands, revealing teary eyes and flushed cheeks to the man, who was standing there, still holding that strange look. 

"Look, whatever your name is, i can't say i appreciate you saving me, 'cause  
obviously i wasn't trying to live." The singer let out a humorless chuckle, breaking the heart of the other even more.  
"But i guess that's what anyone would do. Thank you for that, but now i don't need you worrying about me.  
I've always been on my own.  
I don't need help, i'm fine."

"Is that what you been telling yourself? Or maybe I should say, what you've been forcing yourself to say?"  
The man stated, staring into June's now wide eyes. 

The idol was shocked. He was caught off guard by the fact that the man managed to see right through his words.  
They weren't lies, but they didn't rapresent the truth either. 

He was absolutely not fine, anyone who would've seen him in his current state could tell that he was all things, but fine.  
On the other hand, he didn't need no one. He had always been on his own.  
Costantly falling down and raising himself up, without any help.  
But it looks like every timehe broke down, a piece of him was left behind. 

He himself used to think he was fine. 

But look where he was now. 

June looked everywhere, desperate to not encounter the other hard stare, while he let out a shaky sigh, signaling that he would soon start to fall apart,  
once again. 

"L-look, as i said, i don't need you'r help i-".  
Halfway through the sentence, hot tears starting his face.  
He himself did not believe what he was saying. For some reason, he just did not want to believe the fact that he made it to a point that was so low, that he needed someone else to rely on. 

Someone to fix him. 

He brought his fists to his eyes, not wanting to cry in front of him.  
He did not want to be seen as weak, he wasn't allowed to be weak. 

But no matter how much he rubbed his eyes, the tears wouldn't stop falling.  
At that the stranger wrapped his arms around him, holding him tight in his embrace. 

June weirdly didn't step back, he let the man hold him.  
He found himself liking the warmth of the hug. It was oddly comforting. 

That only made him broke down more, realizing that was the first time he felt this kind of warmness in him. 

"Will you allow me to help you?"  
The man softly whispered against the smaller one.

At that, a cold shiver run down June spine, and he couldn't explain himself why. Maybe it's because he could sense that those words were truthful.  
He couldn't understand why but he felt that he could trust the other with his life, and not just because he saved him from killing himself.

He just felt it inside of him.

"F-Fine, but can i at least know you'r name?"

The man lips twitched into a gentle smile.

"It's Jiwon, but you can call me Bobby."


	8. Hyunjin X Chan Pt.1 [Stray Kids]

Hyunjin was a jealous guy, everyone that knew him knew that. 

He was rather passionate, about his love for someone. 

He would get possessive, overly protective and, you guessed it, very much jealous.  
And thats exactly what happened with Chan. 

Before confessing their love for each other, Hyunjin was actually quite shy and awkward with Chan.  
And that never happened. 

The older just made him feel so safe and nice.  
And going through a difficult time, with not knowing if he was going to debut or not, Chan reassuring words and hugs stuck with him and definitely had an impact on Hyunjin. 

And from that, Hyunjin love for the older, and the effect the boy had on him, slowly started growing more and more.  
It got to a point where the leader couldn't even talk to him without having him flush and collapse on the spot. 

But all of this, was before they confessed their love for each other.

After that, Hyunjin switched to a completely different person.

On the contrary of what people might think, Hyunjin was the more dominant one in the relationship.  
To some it may not have been much of a surprise, seeing as Chan was always so bubbly and cuddly, and overall just a lil' cinnamon roll.

But the other took it to a whole new level.

He absolutely loved spoiling the older.  
He always made sure he had everything he wanted, adoring how after he would get praises along with the bright smile of the leader.

He also loved taking care of the leader.  
I mean, Chan obviously deserved it after working nonstop, almost for day and night, to make sure they had the best of the best for their comebacks.  
Ans after working so hard to make them happy, Hyunjin would be always rjght there to make sure he knew how grateful he was. 

He would not lose a chance to wrap his arm around the other, bring him into his lap and make him drown in those soft and fuzzy blankets that Chan loved.  
He would rock him slowly while whispering sweet praises into the leader's ear, and then he couldn't help but proceed to shower his face with little kisses, 'till he was asleep against him. 

But this, was only his sweet side.

What triggered the possessive and almost obsessive side of him with Chan, was a rather peculiar event.

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

It all started after their Back Door promotion, they finally got their, much deserved, period of rest.

Having time off, Chan bolted right for the studio the day after, claiming he had already ideas for new songs.  
Our dear Hyunjin of course wasn't happy with it and actually did manage to convince him to rest.

Although he pretty much ordered him to have rest and let him take care of him like 'a good boy would'.

And Hyunjin kinda wished he never did that.

Reason being, Chan actually listened to him and took time away from the studio.

He started spending more time with the dorm, pleasing all the members, considering the fact that between comebacks, they didn't get to see him much, as he always locked himself up in the studio. 

They always made sure they spent time with him during the day, almost stealing him away from Hyunjin who would simply glare at them until they gave up and returned Chan back to him. 

Little did he know, it was not them that he had to worry about. 

In fact, little Chan was getting quite close with someone else. 

That someone was Jay Park.

Chan and the other had properly met during the promotions of God's Menu,  
they new each other already but they never actually had the chance to have a real conversation. 

At the time, Hyunjin already was careful around the older.  
Anyone who had eyes could see that Jay was a stunning human being.  
He could have anyone wrapped around his fingers just by looking at them.  
And it seemed the he had taken quite a liking of the curly haired leader. 

Dont get him wrong, it's not like Chan would ever cheat on anyone, he's just not that kind of person.  
It was more like Hyunjin was worried Chan would find someone better than him. 

He was aware he wasn't the best boyfriend in the whole world, with his mood constantly switching and constantly on the edge.

And many other things. 

He knew that he was a tough one to tolerate, so it's not like he could've blamed Chan if he would have left him. 

And he was starting to think it would happen.


	9. Yuta X Mark [Pt. 2]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So basically, this fucking bum ass site deleted the first part of this for no fucking reason and i lost it.  
> Y'all imma be honest if i remember to remake it imma post it, if not, peace.

The sight that came out of the room was _heartbreaking_.

Saying Yuta looked awful would've been an understatement.

His eyes were puffy and red, they weren't the usual eyes filled with joy and happiness they were alle used to seeing.  
His cheeks were flushed and sticky probably due to the heavy crying, and they were completely drained out of life. 

Doyoung was flabbergasted.  
What could've possibly happened to bring Yuta to such state?

He took his eyes off of Yuta, bringing them to Johnny and Taeil, silently asking for answers, only to receive lost looks.

They were completely out of answers, and they were probably more confused that Doyoung. 

Doyoung turned his head back to Yuta, trying to say something, but he was immediately cut off by a loud sob.

Once again, the boy was in tears.

  
Their hearts were clenching, it _physically_ hurt hearing Yuta break down like this. 

Even tho he was one of the oldest, everyone had kind of a soft spot for the Japanese boy. 

Johnny in particular couldn't help but feel the need to beat the ass of the person that did this to him. 

Said boy saw as Yuta brought his hands to his eyes, trying to stop the waterfall of tears running down his cheeks.  
He tried to open his mouth but everytime he did, a broken cry would make his way out of his mouth.

Doyoung, seeing Yuta struggle, wrapped his arms around him, bringing him to his chest, making Yuta relax a bit against him, liking the comfort of the hug.

Doyoung began stroking Yuta's hair, soothing him. He vaguely remembered that head rubs were one of the few things Yuta absolutely loved. 

At that Johnny and Taeil quietly made they're way out, making as little noise as possible.  
They weren't the best at this type of stuff so they figured they'd let Doyoung handle it.

And on top of that, Johnny was way to angry at everything basically, and Taeil was way to emotional at seeing Yuta cry like that. 

A couple of minutes passed and Yuta was calming down, he was still crying and holding onto Doyoung, but it wasn't as bad as before.

The singer noticed the change and began walking Yuta towards the couch, making him sit down while still not letting go of him, worried that he might break down again.

He sat down to next to Yuta, watching the other stare quietly at his hand, with a look Doyoung couldn't quite identify.

"If you want to talk about it, I'm here." Doyoung said in a pathetic attempt to get Yuta to talk, he wanted to help but he couldn't without knowing what he was crying about.  
Thankfully, those words seemed to get to Yuta.

The older sighed one last time, before looking Doyoung in the eyes, it was brief but Doyoung could see the sadness and despair in his eyes. 

He started to tell him everything, from his feeling for Mark, when Kyle made their way into their lifes, Mark behaving differently towards him, to what he saw in the studio.

After he finished Doyoung heart was shattered in a thousand of pieces. He couldn't imagine what that would feel like.

Although he already suspected that Yuta had different feelings for Mark, he couldn't imagine that Yuta's love for him was THAT big.

One thing he couldn't seem to grasp, is how blind Mark had to be to not notice Yuta's feeling.

Yuta sighed again.

"What did i do wrong? Why did he chose him over me? W-wasn't i good enough?"  
Yuta asked, his voice was shaking, like it was on the edge of breaking.

Doyoung looked at Yuta with sympathetic eyes.  
He didn't know what to say, as he had never been in such predicament.  
So he just wrapped hi arm around his shoulder and brought him closer. Although he couldn't imagine what Yuta was feeling right now, he could tell Yuta's love for Mark was one of those love.

Speaking of Mark...  
Doyong was almost angry at him for bringing the other to such state, he was so lucky and he didn't even acknowledge it.

Yuta eyes began watering again, but before any tears could came out, the front door slammed open startling both of them.  
Shocking them even more, a sweaty and messy Mark came in their sight.

Oh GREAT, HE FUCKED.

That was what Doyoung was thinking, with a terrifying frown on his face, staring directly at Mark.  
He immediately snapped his head back to Yuta once he felt the couch move, and just as he thought, the poor boy ran back to his room.

Much to his surprise, Mark ran past him, going after the heartbroken boy

He decided to let him handle the situation for now, although he would have a word with him later.

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

Okay, Mark never meant for any of this to happen, he thought he had the situation under control, but obviously he did not.

The only thing he had under control were Yuta's feelings, and his oblivious ass didn't even know it.

Okay,it went like this.

Mark was almost completely sure Yuta had feelings for him.  
But he needed the final proof of his feelings.

So instead of simply asking Yuta, he decided to make him jealous.

In movies it always worked, so he figured it would work for him too.

Makes sense, right?

And it worked, 'cause now he was sure Yuta liked him, according to his reaction.

Unfortunately it worked a little too well.

That brought Mark here. Standing outside Yuta's door, hearing soft cries coming from his room, breaking his heart little by little.

His shaky hand went to grip the handle of the door and luckily it wasn't locked.

He carefully entered Yuta's room, once in his eyes instantly locked on a shaky form sitting on the edge of the bed.

Mark slowly walked towards him with careful steps, worried that he might scare Yuta.

It seemed like Yuta didn't see or hear him enter his room, because as soon as Mark sat down on the bed, he jumped a little and his head snapped toward Mark.

His glossy and teary eyes were wide open once he recognized him.

He quickly wiped his eyes and adjusted himself on the bed, this not daring to look at him.

Mark guilt level reaches the stars, thinking about the fact that he made the person he loved end up like this

Just as he was about to open his mouth, Yuta's broken voice cut him off.

"W-what are you doing h-here Mark?  
Don't you have somewhere else to be?  
You seemed pretty occupied with Kyle."

"Yu' let me expla-"

"You don't need to explain anything to me. I-i mean from what I have seen, it was pretty clear.  
G-glad you found yourself someone."  
Yuta ended the sentence putting up a sad smile, trying to be genuinely happy for the smaller boy, but no matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't.

"Yuta, I'm sorry-"

"You don't have to be sorry, not at all. I'm happy for you, and I have absolutely no right to be upset anyway."

A breathless chuckle escaped his mouth.  
"In fact I don't even know what is going on with me, w-we're not even together so i don't know wh-"

His rambling was suddenly cut off by a pair of soft lips crushing on his.

Tiny arms made their way around his neck, while he stood with wide eyes, as his brain was processing what was going.

He placed his hands on Mark's hips, almost as he was making sure this wasn't a dream.

He started kissing Mark back, enjoying every second of it.

He constantly wandered what it would be like to kiss Mark, but his imagination could never reach the kind of pleasure he was felling right now.

Soon enough, Mark broke the kiss, leaving them both panting without breath.

"I love you Yuta." Mark whispered, placing his hand on Yuta's flushed cheek.

At that that statement Yuta's heart skipped a beat, as a wave of pure joy and happiness passed through his body.

But that sudden excitement quickly died down as his mind pictured Kyle's face once again.

He stepped away from Mark, that was now confused, clearly not thinking of giving him any kind of explanation.

"Stop joking Mark, please."  
Yuta said, barely above a whisper, looking at his shoes, not able to look Mark in his eyes.

"W-what do you mean?" Mark asked, tilting his head as his confused eyes stared at Yuta.

"You don't love me, you and Kyle are together, you didn't exactly tried to hide it, so s-stop it please."

And finally something clicked in Mark's brain, making him rush towards Yuta.

"No no no, baby look at me." Yuta hesitantly raised his head. As soon as he did two tiny hands cupped his face and began rubbing his cheeks.

"Me and Kyle are not together, never were, never will. You're the one i love, please don't ever doubt that."

Yuta's cheek reddened immediately, hearing Mark words.  
Although he was still confused.

"B-but i saw him kissing you in the studio-"

Fuck.

"Oh yeah, that. Uhm... See i-i-"

Yuta brows furrowed, as a shocking realization formed in his mind.

"DID HE FORCE HIMSELF ON YOU!?"

Exca-

Wait, huh?

"W-well, uhm... Kind of?"

Listen, he didn't want the other to know the real motive, for some unknown reason.  
So he just figured he'd go with it, you know?

After that sentence, Mark passed the following hours trying to calm down Yuta from hunting Kyle down.

He was pretty sure this would backfire on him, but he decided to deal with it later. As he always did for any of his problems.

For now he just wanted to enjoy the fact that the boy he loved was finally his.


	10. Hyunjin X Chan Pt.2 [Stray Kids]

The first time Hyunjin thought Chan was getting tired of him, was when he gradually started ditching him, even when they would've previously organized something to do together, just the two of them. 

'Sorry hun', can't do today, I've got work to do'

'I'm busy baby, maybe tomorrow?' 

'God, Hyunjin, i'm busy, it's not that big of a deal, it can wait.'

It hurt like hell.  
Being almost 'rejected' by the person you love, hurts, but it hurt even more for Hyunjin.

He was used to people getting tired of him after a while.

They would come into his life, make him feel happy, loved, and when he finally got comfortable enough to be his true self, they would decide he wasn't worth being around.  
And with that they would leave him alone, to pick up the pieces of little broken heart.

The difference was that with Chris, it was all different.  
When he finally got to be himself, the other didn't walk out of his life.  
He only loved him more.

So Hyunjin at that couldn't possibly think Chan wanted to leave him, so he simply let it slide, and gave him some space.

But the thing that made Chan Hyunjin thoughts completely turn around, was that he, involuntarily, found out that Chan was actually busy. 

Busy talking with Eunwoo. 

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

It was late, very late, and Hyunjin was still in the practice room.

After claiming that his moves were sloppy and uncoordinated when Minho asked him to come home and rest, he decided to stay a little bit more, until he was satisfied with the outcome of his dance routine.

Despite having a long day, from recording session and photoshoot, he still wanted to practice.  
He even began writing, taking Chan advice, and as much as he enjoyed it, it was pretty exhausting and stressing. 

That's one of the thing that probably bothered BangChan.

After all day apart from all the members, including him, he would still put them and his health aside, and focus of perfecting himself.  
Most of time he would come home to a slightly angry Chan, and still after a long ass scolding, the leader would take time for Hyunjin.  
He would make him dinner, make sure that he got cuddles while letting him rant on and on about what happened in practice, despite of the fact that the leader probably had a worse day than him.

But no matter how much he tried, he still thrived for 'perfection', neglecting, his friends, the love of his life and sometimes his own healt too.

I am so ungrateful...

With that, Hyunjin let out a heavy sigh, with a heavy heart.  
If he wanted to change and make Chan happy, he was going to start as soon as he could.

He glanced at the clock on his phone.  
It was 9:30.  
Not too late.

He started gathering all his things, and as he was doing so he noticed that his notebook was missing.  
It had a couple of verses, and full songs he had written, and he usually kept it to himself, he was pretty shy about showing people his work. 

A frustrated sound left his lips, as he paced back and forth in the room, trying to think were he used the book for the last time.  
Then, he remembered, that in the morning they had a studio session with Chan, and that's were he started to write a new song. 

Specifically about Chan, and his desires. 

With that thought Hyunjin cheeks started flaming up, remembering what he wrote about the leader.  
That fluster slowly morfed into embarrassment, thinking about what would Chan think if he saw that thing. 

And then he stopped.  
Eyes wide and mouth hanging open as he stared at the wall with a frightened smile.  
"Didn't Chan say he was going at the studio today?"  
His smile fell. 

"CHAN IS IN THE FUCKING STUDIO-"  
He quickly slapped his hand on his mouth.  
His cheeks reddening like the skin of a tomato.

He stomped his foot down and groaned, thinking about how clumsy he could be sometimes.

At that, the dancer stormed out of the practice room heading towards the studio. 

He ran and ran until he finally got the studio, panting and drenched in sweat.  
It was not a cute sight.

His heavy breath suddenly got stuck in the throat as he heard something, or someone inside the studio.  
It sounded faintly like the voice of the curly haired leader, but along his voice, Hyunjin heard someone else.

It was definitely a guy, judging by the deepness of the voice, but what concerned Hyunjin, was that it didn't sound like any of the boys.

Now, to others it wouldn't be that big of a deal, but Hyunjin insecurity didn't make that easy to understand.

But there was another thing.  
Chan always told him that he didn't like to be disturbed while he was in the studio, and accordingly he never allowed him to come with him.  
He was quite aggressive with the way he told him too, but Hyunjin understood that.  
Music was Chan most important thing in his life and he had to understand that. 

But why would he bring someone else, plus a guy, and not him? 

Let's not jump to conclusions, Chan would never.

With a trembling hands, he placed his bag on the ground while the other gripped the handle of the door.

He pushed it open and there Chan was. 

On top of Eunwoo, kissing him. 

As soon as he walked in, Chan and Eunwoo noticed his presence, the room got silence. 

Chan audibly gasped, his eyes widen to an inhuman size, as he hurriedly got up from a pretty shocked Eunwoo. 

Oh. 

Hyunjin gulped, feeling his words being stuck in throat. 

"U-uhm..." 

His breathing beacme rougher and quicker. 

Heavy tears started flowing down his cheeks. 

I guess nothing changed huh? 

"I forgot my notebook."

A mere, broken whisper, that felt so loud in the silent room.  
And with that a wry, hollow smile was on his face, making both guys visibly flinch in their spot. 

His eyes traveled around the room in search of the little book, while the other two were stuck in place, not muttering a word. 

The notebook was there on the desk, where he wrote a song, about his boyfriend. 

He immediately grabbed it and dashed out of the studio, deciding not to listen to his boy- to Chan anxious voice, calling for him. 

——————————————————

I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine-

Hyunjin was walking towards the dorm, not having the strength to run or to do anything other than walk, and cry.

Cry, cry and cry.

Everything came down to him.

From when Chan ditched him and their date to go to the studio, claiming he was busy.  
To when he started to snap when Hyunjin even asked about going out, saying that he didn't have to time for something so 'useless'.  
To even starting to get annoyed and irritated at the request of a kiss, or some simple cuddles.

Love just wasn't for him, he had so much to offer, and everyone just took it and threw it in the trash. 

He started shaking more and more as he hurried to get to dorm, and finally go to sleep, and possibly never wake up.

He's just like all the other, i'm so dumb-

"HYUNJIN!" 

Hyunjin heart skipped a beat at the voice, but he did not stop walking. 

"BABY, PLEASE, LET ME EXPLAIN!"

Hyujin sped up, he blocked out everything, the only thing he was hearing were his own broken sobs. 

Gradually, the other voice became lower and lower, and just then, the building of their dorm came in sight. 

He'll get over it. 

He always do, he's used to it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much to think about, should I do a last part?


	11. J. Seph X Bm [Kard]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is kinda rushed, sorry babes, i'll try to edit it

Today was a special day.

Today was the day Matthew has been waiting for over two years.

He waited, not so patiently, this day for the _worst_ two years of his life.

Today was the day Taehyung was coming back form his military service.

And hopefully Matthew would be able to hold him in his arms, and keep him there for good. 

This two years could have been easy to go through for somebody else, but not for Matthew.  
This time surely blessed them, and Matthew was surely super grateful and happy for it.

In fact, they'r career as Kard got increasingly successful, finally gaining thei'r first win and many other awards, and getting insanely popular both in Korea and America. 

But there was constantly something there, bothering him over and over again, not letting him reach peak happiness.

It was like someone was teasing him more and more only to leave him high and dry in the end.

And at one point he finally realized what was keeping him always at the edge.

It was Taehyung.

The older never left his mind.  
Ever since he left for the military service, Taehyung was constantly running through his head.

At first he thought it was simply because he missed him.  
After all, they were always together, never leaving the other side.

From their debut to present days,  
they always had a bond.  
One that nobody other than them could've understood, and Matthew felt this bond grow stronger and stronger as the years passed.

So it surely must've been like that, after all he have never been separated from him this long.  
But then, something shifted.

At some point, he started thinking about Taehyung in a different way.

He can't point out when exactly this thoughts made their way in his mind, he just knows he began fantasizing about the smaller, in a not so friendly way.

For example, a couple of months after Taehyung went to the military, a set of photo of him were released.

In one specific photo, there was him on his knees, holding a rifle that looked rather heavy, even for Matthew.  
That went to highlight Taehyung brand new muscular body.

When Matthew first saw the picture, he was felt like he was about to burst.  
He wasn't sure in what way.

He couldn't be blamed though.

Taehyung looked delicious.

He had a loose black tank top, that made no effort to cover his sculpted abs, covered with a faint layer of sweat, making them shine under the bright light of the sun.

It didn't end there, the other thing that catched his eyes, were his legs.

They were definitely thicker and fuller.  
The roundness of his thighs was doing things to Matthew mind, it was almost like they were attracting him towards them and do what he pleased with them.

Matthew could only imagine what were they like without those pants in the way.

He could imagine what would it feel to feel them, to touch them, to devour them.

After that, his mind would randomly come back to that picture, and at some point, he figured he might as well take advantage of it, if you know what i mean.

That one of the many awakening Matthew had when it came to Joseph, and it wasn't even the bigger one.

The one that snapped Matthew into realizing that he felt more for Taehyung, was when he was with a girl.

In his room.

Having sex.

That must have been the weirdest night he ever experienced.

Throughout the whole act, he couldn't help but imagine Taehyung in the place of the girl.

He began imagining that he was kissing and biting Taehyung lips, that he gripping his hips, that the hair he was pulling was his and so on.

After that it was pretty clear that he wanted the rapper in a not so friendly way.  
He wanted him to be his.

And today was the day his wish would become true, maybe.

⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂⁂

So, shit went the wrong way.

It was not the worst situation, but it it wasn't the best.

At last Matthew got called unexpected by his manager for an appointment that they didn't schedule.  
And with that he was fuming.

Can you blame him?  
He could've been at home now and have the boy that he loved in his arms after two long and excruciating years.

But instead he's stuck in an office with a outdated style, sitting in a rotting chair while the smell of stale cheese burgers was abusing his nose and blessed with the astonishing sight of a cockroach almost as big as his phone.

And if that wasn't enoguh he was forced to listen to a fifty year old man in his mid life crisis, who probably has two kids to take care on his own 'cause his wife cheated on him with a teenager, reverse all of his repressed anger on him.

So we can say it definitely wasn't the best predicament for him.

Luckily for him, his manager cut off the appointment as soon as possible, with the excuse that Matthew didn't exactly fit the concept of the job.

It was partly true, Matthew didn't exactly enjoy making commercials about frying pans.

But it was mostly because the manager felt a cockroach climb up his leg.

And now Matthew was sitting in the back his huge van, kicking his legs in excitement.  
His anger and annoyance long gone as his mind focused on one thing.

Taehyung.

After two years he could finally see him face to face again, he would be able to talk to him, to feel him.

As soon as the driver stopped if front of the dorms building, he bolted right out of the van, sprinting and wasting no time.

As he dodged people on his way, jumped up the stairs and runned through the whole building, his heart began to beat at almost an inhuman speed.

As soon as he arrived in front of the door of the apartment, he heard Taehyung voice.

He froze.

He couldn't move, why couldn't he move?

He dreamed of this moment for two fucking years, but now he was two scared to even move.

And scared of what?

He actually had an ideas of what he was scared.  
It was rejection.

His little big self always imagined of telling the smaller of his feelings.  
He thought of all the different ways he could confess and after that, he dreamed of all the things they would together.

But he never really thought about the fact of a possible rejection.  
Or maybe he just didn't want to think about this possibility.

But now, with just a door separating them, he could help but get anxious.

There were so many things that could go wrong between them.

What if Taehyung already has someone?  
What if he sees him just as a friend?  
What if thinks that I'm just not good enough for him?  
What if-

"Matthew?"

As soon as he heard that voice, Matthew's train of thoughts stopped, and his eyes snapped forward, locking on the person that held all of his love.

Taehyung was right before his eyes, looking as gorgeous as ever.

His hair were back to it's wavy, natural form, giving Taehyung's slightly different face, a more innocent look.

Wich Matthew loved.

He let his eyes wander around the rest of Taehyung's body before literally launching himself at the smaller, trapping him into a bone crushing hug.

He heard Taehyung heavenly laugh that definitely did not make him flush, followed by the feeling of his arms snaking around his neck.  
A hand coming to run soothingly through his hair.

"It's okay, Matty. I'm here."  
Taehyung softly whispered in his hear and God, Matthew almost moaned hearing his voice again.

With that Matthew realized he was actually crying, feeling wet trails come down his cheeks.

"Y-you have no idea of how much I missed you, hyung."  
Matthew cried buring his face into the smaller neck.

"Now i'm here Matt, i'm not leaving you." At that, the younger shivered, while simultaneously tightening his arms around Taehyung.

"Y-You better not." Matthew sniffled a few times before glancing towards Taehyung, who was busy looking at him with the most loving look he ever saw.

Still in each other arms, they moved from standing awkwardly (not for them), in front of the door, to the living room.

After five minutes of just cuddling and small chattering, the older tried to take a step back, only to be pulled right back into the taller embrace.

His confused face was smushed against the other buff chest.

He knew Matthew was rather cuddly and touchy with everyone, but with him, never to this level.  
At first he associated that with the fact that the younger probably missed him, after two years of being apart from each other.  
They were best friends after all, they were always together.

But there was something about how tight his grip was, how possessive it felt, that told Taehyung that that was not the reason.

He raised his head as he placed his hands against Matthew's chest.  
A nervous chuckle escaped him as he eyed Matthew's face,

"M-Matty you can let go n-now."

The other stayed silent making Taehyung even more worried.

He opened this mouth again but he immediately closed once Matthew slowly started pushing him back, till he clumsily falled on the couch behind them with a small yelp, bringing Matthew down with him.

"Wha-"

"You really think, that after waiting for two years, i'm gonna let you go this fast?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lowkey ending it on a cliff-hanger , cause I'm trash.  
> May or may not make a part two.


End file.
